The Continuing Misadventures of SG1 or 101 Things
by ALC Punk and Ryuu
Summary: Angst, chaos, and UST! It's just another normal day for the SGC. Season Eight.
1. In Which Drunkeness Leads To Duty

Disclaimer: We do not own the following characters, concepts, etc. No copyright infringement is intended, no money is being made from this venture. Seriously, suing us would garner you my scratched-up reading glasses and Ryuu's used contacts. 

Rating: PG-13 Warnings: Mild sexual references, violence, language.

Setting: Season Eight, pre-Reckoning. AU. Spoilers for everything beforehand, most likely. Everything was fair game, including Grace, Gemini and New Order.

Pairings: Thor/Technology, Sam/Pete, Sam/Jack, Daniel/Coffee, Teal'c/Silence.

Labels: Gen, ship, action, adventure, humor, angst, drama, violence, explosions, mild romance, cats and dogs living together, lions, tigers, and bears, OH MY.

The authors would like to thank: The cast of SG-1, the wackos on LJ who aided and abetted, Brad Wright, Jonathan Glassner, Thor's adorableness... and Robert C. Cooper, the biggest shipper of them all. Oh, and the JSU English Dept.

And now, without further ado:  
**The Continuing Misadventures of SG-1 or 101 Things A Girl Can Do.**  
by ALC Punk! and Ryuu  
_Chapter One: In Which Drunkeness Leads To Duty_

It had all started as a team-building night at the General's that the four former teammates had decided to hold more out of nostalgia, boredom, and a subconscious desire for some form of normalcy than any other reason. If Sam was managing to keep pace with Daniel on drinking, no one said anything. They just sat back, reminisced, and made snarky comments about the airing of Logan's Run that was currently on.

As the evening progressed, a slightly tipsy Sam started telling Daniel about how annoying he'd been while she was concussed on the Prometheus. Daniel was fascinated at the psychological implications of each of their appearances in her hallucinations, although increasingly pouty each time she made fun of his enthusiasm over the "space-born alien entity."

So, he retaliated by asking for details of what she and her hallucination of Jack had discussed. She immediately closed down.

"That's not important, Daniel."

"But I'm sure it's an absolutely _fascinating_ glimpse into your psyche, Sam," Daniel said, trying not to snicker.

"And it's none of your business," she snapped.

"Oh, come on, Sam," Daniel gestured with his empty beer bottle. Careful not to slur, because if he did, that would be enough to let Jack know he was drunk, and then there would be no more beer in his future. And Daniel was somewhat partial to beer. "You're just upset because he didn't kiss you when you came back."

This triumphant statement made the Lieutenant Colonel stiffen, and she glared at him, "Dr. Jackson, I'm going to pretend you didn't say that."

"Are you saying it's not true, Colonel Carter?" Teal'c's voice was mild. "If so, then I have been wrong on many occasions when I have noticed certain feelings pass between yourself and O'Neill."

Daniel snickered. "Right. Feelings." He smirked triumphantly at Sam.

"You're both on KP for the next ten off world missions," their team leader announced, her tone icy.

Daniel blinked. "Uh, Sam...are you okay?"

"I'm _fine_," she snapped.

"But-"

"We have an early briefing tomorrow," she announced. "We should probably cut this short."

The General coughed from his armchair, "Uh, Carter-"

Ignoring him, she rose. Daniel watched her stalk across the room towards the table where Jack's phone was. Interestingly enough, Daniel wasn't sure, but he thought there were two Sams. Maybe he should stop drinking. "But, Saaaam."

"Stop whining, Daniel."

"Jack."

"AH! Don't drag me into this, Daniel."

"Not a peacemaker, is Jack O'Neill," Daniel muttered, his tone sulky.

"No, I leave that to you," Jack replied dryly. "Carter-"

"I'm calling a cab and going home," she said firmly.

"I believe it would be wise for you to apologize, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c said impassively.

"What'd I say?" Daniel protested.

"Oh, nothing, Daniel," her voice taut with an emotion that seemed to be fury, Sam whirled away from the phone. "Just that you're so wonderfully good at pointing out how every single relationship I have crashes and burns spectacularly."

"What?" Feeling completely confused, Daniel stared at the woman who was as much a sister as a friend, "Sam, what's the matter?"

"Nothing." Her shoulders slumped, though, and all the energy drained from her. She sat on the arm of the couch and tried to smile. "Pete and I broke up."

"Sam, I-"

"Don't worry about it," she said, waving her hand dismissively.

"But, Sam-"

"It's okay. I shouldn't have snapped at you."

There were definitely two Sams, Daniel decided. "Yeah, but I shouldn't have goaded you about Jack."

"Ah, Danny, I definitely think that's enough beer for you." The man in question announced, his voice firm. "In fact, it might be time for Teal'c to put you to bed in the guest room."

"Indeed, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c rose fluidly and held out two left hands towards Daniel. "If you will allow me to assist you?"

"I can walk, dammit." Except that the room was trying to go up and down like a roller coaster. Teal'c's hand on his arm kept him up-right. "Thanks. And, Sam, I'm really -"

"Go sleep, Daniel," she was half-smiling. "I'll expect to see you at the briefing tomorrow."

He very carefully reached out and managed to pat her arm after only a couple of tries. "Night, Sam."

"Night, Daniel." She sounded amused. "Make sure to keep some water by your bed."

The inebriated archeologist nodded and made his way for Jack's guest room, assisted by Teal'c.

"You'd think he'd've learned his limit by now," Jack remarked.

"I think he does know his limits."

Jack looked at her, silent, waiting for the elaboration.

Finally allowing the sigh to escape, Sam slid down onto the couch, curling in the corner and facing the General. "The transition of not having you on SG-1 has been hard on all of us. Of course, Teal'c takes it in stride and is just good at supporting me. But... Daniel misses you, sir." She looked at her knees for a moment, then met his gaze. "He misses the way it was before."

And he isn't the only one. But she left the words unspoken. He didn't need to hear her insecurities at midnight.

"Running a base takes a lot of work."

"Yes, sir. It does."

Their eyes held.

Sam broke the moment first. "Um...I should get home-"

"Carter-"

"Gotta face a grumpy commanding officer in the morning and all," she said, smiling weakly.

The honking of a horn came from outside, and she jumped up before he could say anything else, gathering her purse and jacket. "Good night, sir."

"Carter."

She stopped at the doorway. "Sir?"

"I miss it, too."

The cab honked again. And there were too many thoughts in her head to spill out anything more than an incoherent, "Night, Jack." And then she fled.

Jack stared after the cab long after the taillights were gone from sight. "Night, Sam..."

* * *

Daniel was on his fifth cup of coffee by the time he settled in his seat at the briefing-room table. Next to him, Teal'c appeared perfectly composed and none the worse for wear. Across from them sat Sam Carter looking as if she hadn't slept at all, if the dark circles under her eyes meant anything.

"All right, kids. Nice of you to arrive on time." The General flopped into his seat at the head of the table.

"Jack, you drove us in." Really, Daniel wasn't meaning to be contrary, but he was beginning to feel the coffee. And this would be like every other briefing. He and Sam would explain things, Jack would zone out two seconds in, and Teal'c would be quietly meditating by the seventh sentence. Really, he should suggest to Sam that they just hold briefings with the two of them. Or better yet, send email. He was sure he'd get a lot more done if he didn't have to spend hours preparing his reports and then talking about them to an inattentive audience.

"Right, Daniel, I did." Jack turned to Sam, "Colonel?"

"Well, sir, the MALP indicates P3X-333 to be uninhabited, with what appears to be soil rich in minerals. The UAV shows there to be ruins about five miles from the gate. I recommend SG-1 go on a three-day mission."

"Back by Sunday, Carter?"

"Yes, sir."

Jack nodded. "Good enough. Anything you want to add, Daniel, Teal'c?"

Daniel coughed. "Well, the ruins seem to bear a slight resemblence to those found at Olmec sites, but I won't know anything definate until I can get a closer look at them-" Daniel continued talking, ignoring the slightly glazed-over look on Jack's face.

Eventually, it became too much, and the General interrupted, "Right, Daniel. I'll read your report on it. SG-1, you are a go. Just let me check with Walter when the next-"

"That would be 0800 tomorrow morning, General."

Scowling at the suddenly-appeared secretary-assistant-slave who followed his every move, Jack nodded. "Right. 0800 tomorrow."

"And SG-7 will be free to go with them, too, General."

The unspoken comment made Daniel stiffen. He couldn't look at Sam, not to see her looking stiff and less than confident in her abilities as a commander. Irrationally, he wondered if dropping a thirty-pound report on Jack would make him realize how stupid his mother-henning was. And how much it was undermining one of his best people.

"No, that's all right, Walter. This planet looks boring. I'm sure Carter won't have any trouble. Right, Carter?"

"No, sir," She stood and saluted. "I need to get my gear ready, General. Daniel, Teal'c, if you want to organize your own things, we'll meet for embarkation at 0745."

"Dismissed, SG-1." He nodded and stood. "I've got all this fun paperwork to do, so-"

"Uh, the President also wanted to talk to you, sir," Walter piped up.

Jack sighed. "See you later, kids." He walked out, squaring his shoulders against the piles of paperwork that were about to decend on him.

* * *

"This seat taken?"

Sam looked up from the extremely boring report she was currently wading her way through and managed a small smile. "Sir. Managed to escape for lunch?"

He nodded and dropped into the seat across from her with a relieved sigh. "I've got paper cuts on my paper cuts, Carter."

"I'm sure Dr. Brightman has an ointment for that, sir." She picked up her fork and eyed the limp lettuce on the end with a sigh of her own.

"Don't even start, Carter. Do you KNOW how hard it is to keep leaf lettuce in sufficient quantities without it going bad? Or worse, molding? The cafeteria staff didn't let me hear the end of it for two weeks. I couldn't even get coffee without one of them making the sign of the cross at me."

Stifling a chuckle, Sam quickly ate the mouthful of salad rather than answer him.

"And they want different salad dressing now. Five forms, Carter. In triplicate. With authentication and notarization."

"You have my sympathies, sir." She tried not to smile.

He made a face. "I should retire and make them appoint you to run this place. Serve you right, Carter."

"I-" She got an odd look on her face and then became intently absorbed in her coffee.

"Carter?"

"Did you actually listen to Daniel this morning, sir?"

Jack waggled a french fry at her, "Carter, you know I never listen to Daniel. Now, what's up?"

Reaching out, Sam snagged one of the fries and stared at it before dipping it in her small tub of salad dressing (always on the side-less calories that way). "Well, sir..."

"C'mon, Carter, you know you can tell me anything."

"Can I, sir?" She challenged, "When every mission you continue to undermine and underestimate me? Take P3X-333, for example. The only reason you're not sending another SG team with us is that it looks peaceful."

"Huh? Carter, I just want you guys to be safe."

"So do I, sir, but it isn't your job to baby us every damn step of the way just because you aren't there to see it all through!" She was breathing hard, shocked at how much anger had lurked beneath the surface at his actions. She knew he was only trying to keep them safe. She really did, but it wasn't helping her command if at every turn he was second-guessing her, as if he didn't trust her.

Jack stared at her for a long moment. "Carter-"

She took a deep breath, fighting not to apologize and take her words back. "Sir."

"You think I don't trust you?" His voice was controlled and emotionless.

"Depends on what you mean by trust, sir," she replied, quietly.

"Colonel," his tone was completely formal, lunch forgotten on his plate, the french fries growing colder as he spoke. "As this is a matter for formal complaint, I believe I have an opening this afternoon. Probably around three, if you would like to come by my office to discuss this matter further." He stood, still careful, still controlled, and set his napkin down. "Now if you will excuse me, I have paperwork to sign. You know, in my office, where I don't go through the gate and watch your back."

"Sir," she half-stood, but he was already striding away. And she'd already embarrassed herself enough. She refused to chase after her commanding officer. With care, she sat back down.

For a moment, her eyes registered nothing, then she focused on the reports she'd been reading when he interrupted.

The words didn't register.

Giving up, she dropped her head into her hands and sighed. What the hell had she just done?

"Sam?" A worried voice broke through her haze of self-loathing. "You okay?"

"I'm great, Daniel," she replied, not looking up. "Never better."

A hand patted her shoulder. "Yeah. I always sit like that when I'm in a good mood too."

She looked up to snap something back at him and bit it back at the sympathetic look on his face. "I'm...I'm fine. Really."

He squeezed her shoulder. "Sure you are." He smiled. "But, uh, if you wanted to talk to me about any last-minute mission stuff..."

She nodded. "I'll keep that in mind. Thanks."

"Mhmm. So," he sat down across from her and poked a finger into Jack's ketchup, "I saw Jack leaving. Looked like someone had told him the Tok'ra were back, Apophis was alive, and Teal'c was leaving to join the rebel jaffa on a suicide mission all at once. Know anything about that?"

"Daniel."

"Sam."

A weak smile touched her lips, but she shook her head. "I can't talk about it right now."

"Okay. But, remember..."

"I know." She reached out and touched his hand. "And thank you." She gathered up her papers. "I need to get back to my lab. Things to write up, experiements to check on."

"Archeologists to avoid."

"That too." She shot him a half-smile. "We'll talk later, all right?"

"Even if I have to corner you in your lab?" Daniel grinned.

"Don't force me into recommending you for a whole new battery of tests with Dr. Brightman," she threatened mildly.

He shuddered. "You're evil."

"Dr. Brightman thinks you're a fascinating subject, Dr. Jackson."

"For sticking needles in, yeah."

"Yeah." Sam didn't mention that Brightman seemed to have a crush on Daniel. Standing, she hefted her stack. "Eat something besides coffee today, Daniel."

"Yes, mom. You, too!"

"I had toast. And salad."

"Looks like most if it is still here." Daniel eyed her, "I'll bring you a late lunch."

"Fine, fine." Escaping him, she headed for the door.

"Last minute mission briefing!" he called out. She waved and ducked out the door. Daniel shook his head and returned to his coffee. A plate with a bagel on it slid in front of him and he looked up to find Teal'c regarding him.

"Colonel Carter has explained to me the dangers of coffee on an empty stomach," the former First Prime commented.

Daniel rolled his eyes. "Has it not occurred to all of you that I'm an adult? I can look after myself, you know."

"Indeed." Teal'c eyed the bagel and gave him a stern look.

Daniel sighed and picked it up, giving in to the inevitable. "Thanks."

"You are welcome, Daniel Jackson." Teal'c stood there for a moment, then said, "Was Colonel Carter upset?"

"I don't know. She wouldn't say, but, yeah. I think she was."

"Have you ascertained the cause?"

Daniel took another bite of his bagel and chewed slowly in revenge, knowing that Teal'c might appear to be perfectly calm, but on some level, he was dying of curiosity. Finally, he took a sip of Sam's abandoned water. "I think she and Jack had an argument."

"Pertaining to what?"

"That, I don't have a clue about." Daniel made a face, "If I'd gotten here five minutes earlier, though."

"It would have done no good to eavesdrop, Daniel Jackson."

"Yeah, but... I guess it's water under the bridge."

Teal'c raised an eyebrow. "I believe I will speak with Colonel Carter on the subject of our mission tomorrow."

Frowning, Daniel eyed his friend. "You think she'll talk to you?"

"Perhaps."

Daniel sighed. "Well, good luck, then."

"A jaffa does not require luck unless going into battle, Daniel Jackson."

"Exactly."

Teal'c inclined his head, silently agreeing with Daniel's assessment. "Have you finished preparing for the misson tomorrow?"

Daniel nodded. "Everything's packed. And hopefully we're prepared for anything that'll happen offworld."

Teal'c quirked an eyebrow. "The planet appears peaceful, Daniel Jackson."

Daniel made a face. "Famous last words."

"'Go ahead, make my day.'"

It took Daniel a minute, and by then, the crafty jaffa was gone, heading for Sam's lab. But Teal'c, the man everyone thought had no sense of humor, had just cracked a joke. A very silly one. Letting himself chuckle, Daniel settled down to pick at Jack's abandoned french fries. If nothing else, they weren't completely soggy.

Yet.

* * *

Teal'c stood outside Sam's lab, steeling himself to go in. He had become very familar with Samantha Carter's moods over the past eight years and knew that when she was angry, even the worst System Lords would be no match for her. But he had sensed the tension growing between she and O'Neill for a while, and thought he understood at least part of the cause. No warrior liked being coddled, even by those with the best intentions.

He peeked inside. "Colonel Carter?"

"Teal'c!" She looked up, forcing a smile. "Can I help you?"

"Perhaps it is I who can help you."

She simply looked at him for a moment, then shrugged, "How?"

"You are upset with O'Neill for, as you Tau'ri would put it 'babying' SG-1, is this not correct?"

For a moment, her eyes met his, then she shrugged, "Yes."

"And do you not believe that O'Neill merely has our best interests at heart?"

"Teal'c, I don't..." Carefully, Sam set down the small device SG-15 had brought back from P4X-983. "As the team leader, I feel undermined. I'm one of the few Lieutenant Colonels on the base, and despite my ranking as leader of SG-1, quite a few of the Colonels don't seem to enjoy deferring to me."

Having noticed this himself, Teal'c merely nodded, waiting for her to continue.

Sam took a breath, then let it out slowly. "What good is a promotion or having a team of my own if I'm not actually allowed to _lead_? I don't just want to be a...a token female officer."

"I have never seen you in such a way, Colonel Carter," Teal'c replied calmly. "Nor, I believe, has O'Neill."

Sam rolled her eyes. "Maybe he doesn't see me that way, but he sure seems to treat me like it!" She pounded a fist on the counter in sudden frustration. "I thought I'd proven plenty of times that I can take care of myself!"

"As indeed you have."

"Then why doesn't he seem to see that?"

Feeling her frustration, Teal'c considered his response, "I had a chance to converse with Ishta regarding her method of revenge against Moloc. She believed that he was the greatest evil she would ever face, never noticing the larger evils set to take over in his stead."

She stared at him for a moment, then looked down, "Are you saying I'm not seeing the big picture, Teal'c?"

"O'Neill no longer goes through the gate with us, Colonel Carter."

"Yes, I..." And she stopped, blinking. "Oh."

"Indeed. It is extremely difficult to allow the comrades of his heart to go into danger without seeking every precaution."

Sam swallowed. "Then... Then I think we have a problem, Teal'c. Because he can't keep doing this. And I don't think he'll stop."


	2. In Which Daniel Speaks His Mind

**The Continuing Misadventures of SG-1 or 101 Things A Girl Can Do.**  
by ALC Punk! and Ryuu  
_Chapter Two: In Which Daniel Speaks His Mind_

"Jack, you're being an ass."

The General looked up from the report he was in the middle of signing at the bottom, inspecting the archeologist who had entered without knocking, and was now flopped in one of the chairs across the desk from him. "Daniel."

Daniel regarded him steadily. "Jack."

"Care to elaborate or is this just a run-by mocking?"

"You know what I mean, Jack." Daniel crossed his arms.

"Well, if that's all you wanted to tell me, then I should really get back to work," Jack replied, waving the report for emphasis. "But thank you for that astute assessment of-"

"Dammit, Jack!"

"Go away, Daniel."

Throwing up his hands, Daniel swore in Egyptian, then changed tactics. "Did you know that there are at least six SG team leaders who believe Sam's only got SG-1 because you greased the wheels for her? And that she isn't competent to lead any team in the field-and before you say it, none of them are Reynolds."

"Daniel, I don't have time for base gossip."

"But you do have time to make damn certain Sam and SG-1 never go out alone unless it's a peaceful planet?" Daniel let some of the scorn he felt show through.

"I already had this discussion with Carter," Jack replied coldly. "I'm protecting this base's best team."

"Who are more than capable of protecting themselves!" Daniel snapped. "Sam learned how to lead from the best, Jack!"

"Did she also learn how to be an ass?" Jack commented mildly.

"You're never going to know what she's capable of unless you cut the apron strings, Jack!"

"This dicussion is over, Dr. Jackson."

"Fine." Standing stiffly, Daniel glared at the man he thought he knew. "Thank you for your time, General." About-facing, he stalked from the office, almost running into Teal'c as he exited the doorway. "Adolf will see you now."

Teal'c raised an eyebrow at him, but didn't comment.

Jack made a face. "Can I help you, Teal'c?"

"I was just speaking to Colonel Carter," Teal'c replied calmly.

The General sighed. "So, you're also here to tell me I'm an ass?"

"I believe that judgment is up to you," Teal'c answered, unruffled. "However, Colonel Carter did have concerns over your confidence in her leadership abilities."

Jack rolled his eyes. "Has everyone gone nuts?"

"While I do not doubt that you have every confidence in Colonel Carter's abilities, O'Neill. It is less clear to an outsider."

"Great. More gossip. Don't you have better things to do than pass on second-hand comments, Tealc?"

"Indeed, O'Neill. And yet, you have not listened." For a moment, the large jaffa eyed the man he greatly respected. Almost, he sighed. O'Neill was not understanding, possibly because he didn't want to. And unlike Colonel Carter, who would think things through, he suspected the old soldier across from him would merely shelve the thoughts and believe what he wished.

"What am I supposed to be hearing?" Jack replied, frustrated. "Carter's unhappy? I don't know what to do about that, Teal'c. I trust her abilities. She never would've been promoted if she couldn't do the job."

"She does not feel that way, O'Neill."

"Then why isn't she in here telling me this?" Jack snapped.

"I believe you know that answer to that question already."

"No. No I don't. And I'm sick of you and Daniel insinuating that this is somehow all my fault, Teal'c!" He stood, and slammed a fist onto his desk. "And now, if you'll forgive me, Teal'c, I believe I have an appointment."

On cue, Walter appeared in the doorway, "Sir, Major Davis is here from the Pentagon to go over the budget rewrites."

"See?" Looking suddenly exhausted, Jack sank back into his chair. "Send him in, Walter."

If he were given to swearing, Teal'c was pretty sure he would have. Instead, he stood himself and turned without inclining his head to the man he considered a friend. Right now, he wasn't sure about him being worthy of his respect.

"Teal'c..." an utterly weary voice called out.

"O'Neill?" Teal'c replied, not turning.

"Look, tell Carter-" Jack sighed. "Never mind. I'll tell her myself."

* * *

"He doesn't _listen_!" Daniel knew he was ranting. He knew Sam didn't need to hear this, but he still couldn't help himself. Jack's dismissal of his concerns had left him angry and frustrated, and he'd found himself gravitating to her lab without conscious thought.

"I know, Daniel." Her tone was distracted, her fingers flying over the keyboard as she worked on some report.

"And you're not listening, either," he continued, his tone rueful. "Sorry, Sam. It's just..."

She glanced at him and half-smiled. "I know. So, any further thoughts on the ruins we're going to look at, tomorrow?"

"I wanted to get a closer look at some of the carvings the MALP showed," Daniel replied, trying to shove his brain back into work mode. "You realize that this might actually shed some light on why the Olmec civilization just vanished? Archeologists have debated for years on what happened to them."

Sam smiled and shook her head. "Too bad the only ones who get to know have to have the proper clearance."

"Yeah." Daniel made a face. "But at least _I'll_ get to know."

"Sometimes that's all we seem to have, isn't it?" Sam replied a bit distantly.

Daniel stood for a moment, watching her, then nodded, "Yeah. Sometimes, I wonder why we do all of this."

"And then we get chased by the jaffa?" she said, her tone light.

"Well, that, or I fall and hit my head. Or Jack dies."

She blinked at him. "Or you ascend."

A grin tugged at his lips, and he looked away. "So... If you could do anything you wanted, right at this moment, what would it be?"

"Go back in time and let the air out of your tires the afternoon I visited the Colonel and we discovered Hammond was being replaced."

Daniel reached over to pat Sam's shoulder, a sad smile crossing his face. "Sam-"

"How about you?" she asked quickly. "What would you do?"

He looked down. "I don't know. Get my own on-base barista?" He shot her a quick smile.

She chuckled, "And never leave your office again?"

"Yup." It sounded like a plan. He'd never have to see Jack again. Well, unless the General came to bother him.

"So, Daniel. Dinner?"

"What, now?"

She snorted and rolled her eyes, "No, at about seven?"

"Somewhere off-base?"

"Yes," she replied firmly. "O'Malley's? I think we're finally allowed back in there."

"Sounds good." Daniel nodded. "Want me to see if Teal'c's free?"

Sam nodded. "Yeah. We'll have a team night," she said lightly. "It'll help us all bond before we go off-world, right?"

"I'm not sure we can get much more bonded," Daniel replied dryly.

Rolling her eyes, she pointed at the door. "Now go away so I can finish this day's work, Daniel."

"Yes, sir." He mock-saluted.

"Besides, don't you have things to do, too?"

"Always."

Sam grinned. "I'll see you at seven, Daniel."

"Do I get to see you beat every guy in the place at pool again?"

She laughed and pointed at the door again. "Out!"

Daniel bowed and scampered away.

* * *

"Sir?"

Jack looked up and blinked. "Carter?"

"It's three," she said quietly. "You said you had an opening then."

"Ah."

She stood there, staring down at him. "The things I said earlier, sir, I -"

"Want to take them back, Carter?"

A pause, and she swallowed. "No, sir. I don't." This was harder than she'd thought it would be. Staring straight ahead, she elaborated. "I believe the lack of trust you're exhibiting in my command abilities is detrimental to both SG-1, and myself, sir."

"Carter, I trust you." He looked at her in disbelief. "I don't know where you get the idea that I don't. There's no one else I'd rather have watching my back."

"I feel like you trust me personally, sir, but you don't trust me to do a good job leading SG-1 without help, and I don't understand why I was promoted if you don't think I can do my job."

"Carter-"

"Permission to speak freely, sir?"

He raised an eyebrow. "You weren't before?"

"Sir?"

He sighed. "What is it, Carter?"

"I've heard the base gossip about why I was promoted-"

"Carter, that's not true," he interrupted her. "Any personal feelings had nothing to do with your promotion. You _earned_ it. Many times over."

"If that's true, sir, then why is SG-1 rarely sent out alone?" She challenged. "Why are we only sent alone if the planet is peaceful?"

"Just tryin' to keep Daniel's injury count down, Carter."

She wanted to smile, but this was something too serious. And he still wasn't getting it. "General Hammond never sent anyone out with SG-1, sir."

"Well, yeah, but -"

"He trusted you, sir. In a way that you don't trust me."

"SG-1 doesn't have four people anymore."

What? She blinked at him, "Sir, what does that-"

"If I'm going to be sending you out alone from now on, Carter, you have to have a fourth. And not some damned Russian who'd let you die to save his own skin."

"Sir, I -" she floundered for a moment, then straightened, "I want Jonas Quinn."

"Jonas isn't military, Carter," he replied, his expression unreadable.

"Neither are Daniel and Teal'c, sir."

"Both have proven they can handle military protocol and handle themselves in combat."

"And Jonas hasn't, sir?" She fought the urge to cross her arms, telling herself that there was no need to go on the defensive.

"It's going to be hard to talk the Kelownans into that, Carter," he warned.

"But who else understands the team better than Jonas, sir?"

"I'm not disagreeing with you." He sighed. "Fine. I'll get in contact with Kelowna and see what we can arrange."

Which was all she could ask, since he still wasn't getting it. Sam wondered if it was simply an inability to communicate on her part. But there would be time for more discussion later. "Thank you, sir."

"Meanwhile, Carter, until we have him, I'm going to assign one of the marines to your team."

She made a face, but then considered. If the marine didn't have problems with her command-style, there would be one more person who could confirm that she was competent. "Who, sir?"

"I was thinking Captain Theo Jones would fit in nicely for a while."

And be big and beefy, and probably argue with her every step of the way. Sam didn't sigh. That would be beneath her. "All right, sir. Permission to kick his ass back through the stargate if he disobeys an order?"

"Granted, Colonel." He nodded, "I think I'm about-" The phone rang, cutting him off. "O'Neill."

Sam raised an eyebrow and pointed towards the door. Jack shrugged and gestured to one of the chairs in front of his desk. She took the offered seat, perching on the edge carefully.

"Yes, Mr. President, I did meet with Major Davis about the base's budget." He paused. "No, I don't feel that's an unnecessary expenditure."

Sam studied her hands and began mentally running simulations in her head while Jack continued to talk to Hayes, shooting her the occasional apologetic glance. Finally, after about fifteen minutes, she took a pen and memo pad from his desk and scrawled "O'Malley's, 1900" and slid it in front of him. He read it and nodded.

Carefully not making more noise than she had to, Sam got up and headed out the door.

Walter looked up at her from his desk, "Is the General -?"

"The President."

"Ah. He had mentioned he might call today. We'd been hoping it would be tomorrow."

Sam shrugged, "Make sure he's out of his office by 1830."

"Yes, ma'am."


	3. In Which Pool Occurs, And Someone Gets K...

**The Continuing Misadventures of SG-1 or 101 Things A Girl Can Do.  
**by ALC Punk! and Ryuu  
_Chapter Three: In Which Pool Occurs, And Someone Gets Kissed_

"I can't believe they let us back in here," Daniel muttered as he flopped into a chair across from Sam. Teal'c sat a little more decorously, the seat only protesting slightly. "Shouldn't we have gotten a booth?"

"General Hammond had the SGC pay for damages, remember?" Sam smirked, "Besides, we bought a lot of food last time."

"Oh, God. Don't remind me." Grabbing his water glass, Daniel raised it. "Still, maybe we can play pool tonight? And you can get lots of money?"

"Again? Gosh, Daniel, what am I, your pool hustler?"

"You're SG-1's very own special pool hustler, Sam."

She chuckled, then shot a glance at the door, and sighed. "Yeah, well. You'd better buy me steak first."

"Are we waiting for someone else?" Daniel asked, having noticed Sam's new habit.

"Um... the General?" Sam muttered.

"What?" Daniel spluttered. "Why?"

"He was on the phone with the President, so we couldn't finish our conversation," Sam explained.

"You know what I mean, Sam!"

She sighed. "I wanted to give him a chance to talk. I owe him that much."

"You know, Sam..." Daniel shook his head. "Never mind. So, what did you want to talk about before Jack got here?"

"I got a letter from Cassie today," resolutely ignoring what Daniel hadn't said, Sam continued, "She's settling into the dorm fine. Although I think she's a little homesick."

"Oh, good. Has she decided what degree to go for?"

"She's not going to be an archeologist, Daniel."

"I believe Cassandra Frasier has expressed a preference to work with people," Teal'c interrupted before they could get into a friendly bckering match.

"I work with people!" Daniel protested. "Non-fossilized ones, even!"

"You're in a unique situation though, Daniel," Sam replied with a smile.

"Perhaps she should consider following in her mother's footsteps?" Teal'c suggested.

"I don't know." Sam tapped her fingers on the table. "She asked me about field medicine once and then proclaimed it 'gross.' I'm not sure that's the best sign for a budding MD."

"Well, I somehow don't think she'll be following in Jack's footsteps." Daniel made a face, "Cassie's not really into infiltration, counter-terrorism and assassination."

"You haven't listened to some of Janet's comments, have you?" teased Sam, then she blinked.

"No." His voice soft, Daniel looked down at his glass. "I haven't."

"To Dr. Frasier." Teal'c was holding his glass up, solemnly looking between the two of them.

"To Janet." Chorused Sam and Daniel.

"To the scariest woman I have ever met. Aside from Carter." The fourth glass clinked into the formation, startling the other three. The General slid into the vacant seat with a sigh.

"Glad you could make it, sir," Sam said softly.

He nodded. "Sorry I'm late. The President's call put me behind on a lot of things." He picked up a menu. "Have you guys ordered yet?"

"No," Daniel said, sparing him a quick glance. "We decided to get drinks first."

Jack nodded. "Drinks seem like a good idea."

The group lapsed into an uncomfortable silence.

Luckily, the waitress arrived a moment later and began handing out the drinks. She took the General's order for a Guinness and disappeared towards the bar. Sam stared blindly at her menu, trying to decide what she wanted. This had been a stupid idea.

"So, what, do I have leprosy? The plague?"

"Huh? Jack, what're you talking about?"

"C'mon, Daniel, you three have been remarkably silent-well, T's always silent, but you two," he gestured at Sam and Daniel, "Are always talkative."

"I'm trying to decide what I want, sir," Sam said, then hid behind her menu again.

"Lemme guess, Carter. A steak medium rare, baked potato with the sour cream on the side, and a diet soda."

She flushed and glared at him, "Maybe I'll get something different this time, sir."

"Jack."

"Daniel."

"Stop this." The other three occupants of the table looked up at Teal'c. His expression was stern. "We are friends. Are we no longer capable of sharing a meal as friends?"

There was a shamefaced pause.

Jack spoke first. "You're right, T. We are." He looked over at Sam. "I'm sorry, Carter."

She bit at her lower lip. "It's all right, sir."

"I'm not going to apologize for speaking the truth, Jack," Daniel announced, his tone combative. Then he half-smiled, "But I won't bring it up at dinner if you won't."

"You're an ass, too, Danny."

Sam eyed them both. "Stop that."

"Yes, mom," Daniel mocked.

She rolled her eyes. "Is everyone ready to order?"

The waitress returned shortly after, took their orders, and disappeared again. For a moment, the four were silent. And then Teal'c began telling them a story of Rya'c when he was but a young child. They all chuckled at the image of the young boy daring his father to climb a tree.

"I was informed that it was the tallest tree in the world and that a true warrior would be unafraid to scale such a height." Teal'c shrugged elegantly. "How could I refuse such a challenge?"

"So...did you make it to the top?" Sam asked.

Teal'c paused. "No."

"What happened?" Jack asked, surprised.

"Near the top of the tree," Teal'c gestured vaguely, "a sap had coated the branches that was unusually slippery. I put my hand upon one of these branches-"

Sam winced. "How high up were you?"

"It was a very tall tree. Perhaps not the tallest on Chulak," Teal'c smiled, "but certainly very old and of an impressive height."

"Ouch," said Daniel, his voice commiserating. "I fell out of a tree, once. I was about. God, I think I'd just turned ten. One of the kids from school said I wouldn't dare climb the tree in Mr. Gamgee's yard. And, of course, all the kids were scared of him because he was a cranky old man-kind of like you, Jack-"

"Hey!" The General protested.

"Let Daniel finish, sir," Sam shushed him.

"So, I climbed the tree in his yard. And on the way down, a branch broke. I tumbled down and hit the ground just right to break my arm."

"And? C'mon, Daniel, there's more to it than that."

"Yes, there is, Jack. Mr. Gamgee saw me fall and called an ambulance, then he helped me up, sat me on his porch and gave me a glass of lemonade. I stopped calling him weird and scary after that."

Sam smiled. "I fell out of a lot of trees when I was a kid too. I think that was why Dad finally built me a tree house in the backyard. He said if I was going to be climbing up there all the time, he'd prefer that I had some sort of ladder."

"You were a complete tomboy, weren't you, Carter?" Jack sounded faintly amused.

"Not... completely."

"Not completely, is this code for, 'I actually played with dolls', Carter?"

She snorted, "Maybe."

"Uh-huh." The General shook his head, "Fine, but this is you, Carter, where are the explosions?"

Daniel snorted, "Oh, like Sam would have explosions in her childhood. Right, Sam?"

She shrugged, "Once or twice."

"On purpose?" demanded the General.

"Maybe."

Jack narrowed his eyes, "C'mon, Carter, what'd you do, blow up the art department?"

"Toilets in the cheerleaders' special practice locker room." she admitted, quickly grabbing her drink and sipping.

"Carter, the juvenile delinquent? Impossible."

She shot him a half-smile. "What, did you think I spent my entire childhood hiding out in the library, sir?"

"Well, actually-"

"Sir!" Sam glared.

"Kidding, Carter." He held up his hands in a placating gesture and grinned. She fought not to smile back, although he could see the laughter lurking in her eyes.

"How about you, Jack?" Daniel asked. "Anything we should know about your childhood?"

"Classified." He smirked.

"Jaaaaack!"

Tilting her head to the side, Sam said, "He's probably simply not telling us that he used to read to little old ladies after school. And went to church, like a good little boy."

"Carter."

"Sir?" Her look was guileless.

"Carter, how come you got to blow things up, and I'm a Reading Rainbow reject?"

"Don't know, sir."

"Did you help little old ladies across the street too, Jack?" Daniel smirked.

"Spacemonkey..." Jack began, only to be interrupted by the arrival of their food.

Sam let out a sigh. "Just what I needed," she said, sniffing appreciatively.

Jack nodded. "Definitely nice to get away from the mess once in a while," he said, his sigh echoing Sam's.

With mutually unspoken agreement, the four dug into their meals, leaving the talking until later.

* * *

For the most part, conversation had been casual. Talk of hockey, The Simpsons, star-gazing, even a little bit of Daniel's favorite pet projects. There had been one or two faltering moments, but they'd moved past them. Re-learning to talk as simply SG-1 was strange, after seven years of doing just that. But now it was different.

Eventually abandoning their table for the bar, Daniel was amused to see Sam make a bee-line for the pool tables. "Want me to find you a mark, Sam?"

She laughed, and glanced at the one empty table. "Nah. I just want to stretch a few kinks out."

"Kinks?" Jack looked up, raising an eyebrow. "You have kinks, Carter?"

She decided it wouldn't be mature to stick her tongue out at her CO and settled for simply shaking her head and walking over to the pool table.

He watched her set up the table and the look of concentration on her face before she broke, oddly fascinated by her intent expression as she surveyed the pool balls. It was the same look he often saw when he found her puzzling out some universal secret or another.

Daniel took the other cue, and waved it. "Am I even going to get to use this?"

"No." Sam replied, but she was smiling.

"Can I at least break?"

"Sure, sure, I'll be magnanimous."

"Nice of you, Carter." Jack said, his tone sarcastic.

"Isn't it, sir?" She flashed him a grin, then backed away from the table and waved. "All yours, Daniel."

The archeologist saluted her with a grin and studied the table before positioning his cue and making a surprisingly strong break, sinking two balls. He looked startled.

Sam smiled. "Nice shot."

"Luck," Daniel answered.

"Looks like you might have some competition, Carter," Jack commented.

Sam shrugged. "It'd be a nice change, sir." She watched Daniel set up his next shot.

"Are you saying you don't feel challenged at work, Carter?"

"Maybe."

"Wait, let me guess. You miss the excitement of running for your life."

She rolled her eyes, and then smirked as Daniel missed his third shot. "You could say that, sir."

Daniel sighed, "Oh well, it was fun while it lasted."

"The game's not over yet, Daniel," she said encouragingly.

"I'm playing against the pool champion of the SGC," he replied. "I don't need Jonas to tell me how this one's going to end up."

Sam grinned, covering her sudden start at the mention of the Kelownan. "You might surprise yourself, you know." She took her shot, neatly sinking another two balls.

"Already did." Daniel gestured to the nearly emptied table.

Shaking her head, Sam started to lean over to take her next shot, and was interrupted.

"Hey, wanna play against someone with actual skill?"

Slowly straightening, Sam looked the man over for a moment. He was as tall as Daniel, with muscles rivaling Teal'c's. Dark hair, intense blue eyes, and a smirk. "You going to put your money where your mouth is?"

"Oh, this should be fun," Daniel murmured.

"Twenty, I sink every ball on the break." The man challenged.

"I'm Sam. And if you think that's putting your money where your mouth is, you really live your life sedately."

"Brad. Fine. A hundred."

"Two. And I'll break."

"Fine."

She smiled sweetly. "You've got yourself a deal, Brad." She turned to set the table up, catching sight of Jack's quick smirk and fighting not to break out one of her own. She really loved taking the younger guys down a peg.

"You stalling?" he asked.

"Nope." Sam finished racking the balls, lined up the cue ball, and made a clean break. She smiled up at him. "Just like making sure I do it right."

"Only way to do it," Jack piped up, saluting with his beer.

Brad glanced up at him, then looked down at the table, sizing up his possible shots. He took one, managing to sink a ball, but missing his next and gesturing to Sam ironically. "Your turn."

"Such a gentleman." She took over, neatly sinking two more balls.

Jack tried to hide his chuckle.

It was the beginning of the end, really. Brad never got another shot as Sam neatly and efficiently cleared the table. Calling every shot calmly before sinking it.

Daniel watched with amusement as she moved around the table, Brad watching. Halfway through, his mouth was hanging open.

Then there was only the eight ball left. Sam eyed it. "Eight ball, corner pocket."

Another completely easy, yet well-done bank shot, and Sam smirked in triumph at the man across from her. "Sorry, uh, Brad."

He shrugged and smiled, then handed over the cash. "Next time, maybe."

"Yeah, maybe." Still flushed with amusement and pleasure at having defeated him so effortlessly, Sam turned and found the General almost directly in her path. For a moment, she stared at him. Irrational irritation at his closeness filled her, and she stepped into him. A sudden thought occured, one that she should never have entertained.

Too late.

Her body stretched, going up on tiptoes, and her hands slid behind his head. For one startled moment, his mouth simply froze against hers. And then he was kissing her back.

"Uh, guys?" Daniel's startled voice broke in on the moment.

"In a minute, Spacemonkey," Jack muttered against Sam's mouth.

There was a pause.

"Right... sure." Daniel stepped away. "I, uh, I think I need another drink, T."

"Indeed," Teal'c replied, walking with Daniel to the bar.

Sam pulled away from him a moment later. "Oh, god... " she whispered.

"Yeah... I enjoyed it too," he said softly, touching her cheek.

"Oh, god..." she repeated, her eyes wide.

"You won."

"What?" Sam was fairly certain she wasn't processing on all levels correctly. She backed away from the General, and into the pool table. "Um, sir..."

"You want to lock this in a room, too?" For just a moment, Jack let his bitterness out.

"No." Damn. Clamping down on her instinctive reaction to flee, Sam drew in a breath. "We need to talk about this. Or, think, or -" She realized he was close enough to touch, and her mouth dried.

"Talking always gets us in trouble." announced the General, then bent down and kissed her again.

"Sir-" She allowed the kiss to distract her for a moment, then forced herself free of the pleasant haze surrounding her thoughts and managed to pull away. "Jack, please..."

"Sam." His shoulders slumped and he gave her a weary, defeated look. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," she whispered, touching his arm. "I kissed you first. It's my fault."

"Sam," he muttered again, then closed his eyes. "I... I-dammit."

"Uh, Sam," Daniel interrupted them, Teal'c with him. Both looked uncomforable. At least, it if was possible to imagine a six-foot tall jaffa looking uncomfortable. "Now might not be the best time, we kind of have a mission to go on tomorrow."

"Home." She stepped away from the General (not without a twinge of regret), "I should go home. And sleep."

"I'll drive you. Jack can drive Teal'c back to the base."

"Gee, thanks, Daniel."

"Better hold off on the thanks until later," the archeologist-linguist suggested.

"Carter-"

She touched his hand. "Three days," she said. "We'll talk about it when I get back." She took a deep breath, then leaned in and kissed his cheek. "See you at work, sir."

"Night, Carter." He watched her follow Daniel out the front door.


	4. Wherein Our Heroes Embark For a Boring M...

**The Continuing Misadventures of SG-1 or 101 Things A Girl Can Do.**  
by ALC Punk! and Ryuu  
_Chapter Four: Wherein Our Heroes Embark For a Boring Mission._

0745. Right on time, Sam thought as Daniel came into the gateroom, carrying his pack and talking animatedly with Nyan. The young Bedrosian was still an efficient assistant for nearly the entire archeology department, and Sam knew they were grateful for him on a monthly basis. He was also good at keeping Daniel from missing his appointments.

"And you'll remember the translation on the pre-Sumerian glyphs from-"

"Yes, Dr. Jackson." Really, Sam wondered how he could sound so patient and sweet, and still also sound sarcastic. "I'll remember."

It was definitely an art. "Daniel. Nyan."

"Colonel Carter," Nyan smiled at her, "Safe journey."

"Ah, it's a mineral survey. I don't think it'll be a problem."

Just then, the General called from the control room, "SG-1, are you prepared to depart?"

She turned and waved upwards, automatically filing the sensations of attraction and disquiet away to study later. This was the General, and this was her job. A distraction could cost someone their life.

The gate began dialing.

"Chevron seven locked," Walter announced a few moments later and the gateroom was filled with a rippling light as the gate activated.

Sam looked over at Captain Jones. He looked back at her calmly. "Colonel?"

"Let's go, Captain."

He saluted. "Yes, sir."

SG-1 walked up the ramp and into the wormhole, feeling the familiar disorientation as they were transported to P3X-333. Daniel looked around as they stepped out.

"Trees."

"And they're green," Sam said dryly. She looked up at the low-lying sun, and considered, "Teal'c, you and Captain Jones scout out a place for base camp. Daniel and I will make a sweep of the area. Call when you've found a spot."

"Indeed." The tall jaffa gestured to the Captain.

Sam watched the two set off for a moment, then glanced at Daniel, "Shall we?"

"After you." He sneezed, then made a face. "I think there's something in the air I'm allergic to."

"And this is new?" she asked lightly as they skirted the edge of the woods, peering under the branches, her eyes automatically searching out the likely hiding places of jaffa or foe.

"Well, as long as I don't turn into a caveman," he replied, mimicking her actions. Sam shot him a quick, proud smile when he wasn't looking. He'd really learned a lot in eight years.

"I'd rather not go through that one again, myself." She looked up at the trees. "It's funny. These aren't that different from what you find on Earth."

"But it's still completely different when you're looking at trees on Earth?" Daniel asked.

She nodded. "Exactly."

Silence fell, then, a companionable one built upon years spent working together. Nothing appeared to break the silence, although in the distance, a breeze rustled the leaves and birds called to each other. Eventually, Sam began circling, heading back towards the stargate.

Daniel, apparently, took that as his signal to begin talking again. "So. You and Jack..."

Carefully keeping her attention on her surroundings, Sam shifted slightly to glance at him. "What about us?"

"Kissing." He waved a hand.

"I was excited and happy about beating that idiot."

"Really?" There was something derisive in his tone. "I'll have to make sure I'm not in your vicinity the next time you're excited and happy about something. Wouldn't want to get accidentally kissed."

"Daniel-" she began.

"I'm not military, Sam." He looked at her seriously. "I don't care about the regs. But I want to know if this is going to make our problem worse."

She sighed and looked down. "I don't know. It just... happened. It shouldn't have."

"Sam." She looked up to see him watching her sympathetically. "Have you ever thought that this might be why Jack's being, um..."

"Such a mother hen?" she asked dryly. "Yeah. I have."

"Well, what are you going to do about it?"

Sam thought back to a certain envelope she'd put in Jack's inbox that morning. "I've been working on a plan."

"A plan?" Daniel shot her a disturbed look. "Is this going to make me regret saying anything?"

"No. And I'm not telling you the plan, either, so don't ask."

"Yay." Side-stepping a branch in his path, Daniel was silent for a few more minutes, then brightened, "Can we go to the ruins soon?"

"Yes, Daniel." Not rolling her eyes, Sam glanced at him. "As soon as we've finished this sweep, we'll meet up with Teal'c and Jones. And then you and Teal'c can head to the ruins while Jones and I do the soil sample thing."

"Good." Daniel almost bounced as he continued walking. "Because if those really _are_ Olmec..."

Sam listened as patiently as she could while he rattled on. If nothing else, it kept her awake on this rather boring planet. Not that she'd wish for the goa'uld or replicators to show up. But a forest fire, or even rain, might be pleasant. Natives who were restless and required an explosives expert would also be amusing. But she was resigned to spending the next three days absolutely bored.

If nothing else, at least she could practice her skills at hiding her irritation with Daniel.

* * *

"And the carvings perfectly corresponded to ones found at sites in-" Daniel broke off his excited monologue to poke his fork cautiously at the plate in front of him. "Just _what_ am I eating?"

"Chicken," Sam replied, poking at hers. "At least... I think it's chicken."

They were settled around a cheerfully glowing campfire where Daniel had been regaling them for the past hour about the ruins and why they were apparently the greatest thing ever. Jones had a slightly glazed-over look on his face, causing Sam to hide a grin. She was pretty sure he was now grateful for being taken along on the "boring" soil samples.

Teal'c poked at the fire with a stick, causing a shower of bright sparks to fly upwards.

"Meals rejected by Ethiopians," Jones announced, holding up a forkful of something that might have been chicken.

Sam grinned at him, "Even the Tok'ra know better than to eat MREs."

"Lucky them," Daniel muttered.

"On Chulak, a man would be grateful for such food as this," announced Teal'c. "If there were nothing else, including dead comrades, to eat."

"Ew. Thanks, Teal'c," making a face, Daniel set his aside. "I think I'm going to go pretend I actually ate and go over my notes."

Sam could see that Jones was clearly trying not to laugh, and was forced to revise her earlier assessment of the man still further. He was a career soldier and marine through and through, but she found herself growing to like him more and more. He took orders well, chipped in and did his share of the work without complaint, and seemed to be hiding a lively sense of humor under that stoic façade. If they didn't get Jonas back, she was seriously thinking about requesting that Jones stay on with SG-1.

...assuming she actually stayed in command of SG-1, of course.

Sam frowned a bit and stared into the dancing flames.

"Sam?"

She looked up at Daniel and managed a smile. Of course he'd noticed. "What is it?"

"You okay?"

"Fine. Just planning out tomorrow," she said quickly.

He didn't look convinced, but he dropped the subject with the sort of look that promised he'd bother her about it later and headed towards the tent he was sharing with Jones. "All right. But remember I want to be at the ruins bright and early."

"Yes, Daniel. And you've got second watch!" He waved his hand in agreement. She poked at her food some more, then sighed. "I think that's all I can eat, Captain, Teal'c, either of you still hungry?"

Jones blinked at her, then shrugged, "I'm always hungry, sir. My mama used to say I had more room for food than any growing boy had a right to."

She handed the plate over. "Your mama was probably right." She glanced at her watch. "Teal'c, I'll go ahead and take the third watch. You've got the last one. Jones, you're up first."

"Yes, sir."

He didn't question the order. Sam fought down a strange surge of exultation. Of course he hadn't questioned it, she thought to herself as she began gathering her supplies for the coming day. She was his superior officer, regardless of sex, or rumors of competency. There was no reason to set a watch, but Sam felt the need to be extra cautious. The caution drilled into her by instructors, danger, and Jack O'Neill.

Sam smiled at him and Teal'c and stood. "I'm going to get some sleep. Don't stay up too late, Teal'c. Good watch, Captain."

He nodded. "Thank you, sir."

"Pleasant dreams, Colonel Carter," Teal'c replied gravely as Sam headed for the tent she was sharing with him.

* * *

The third watch had been Colonel O'Neill's. Sam leaned back against her chosen log and studied the night sky-what she could see of the constellations were completely unfamiliar. She made a mental note to get some images of them the next night, since getting out the equipment would probably wake Teal'c.

She knew why he took it-the same reason she did now. Because it was the time when strange things could happen. Or maybe that was simply old superstition.

Silence settled over their camp, broken only by Daniel's soft, slightly congested snores. Sam grinned. Some things really never did change.

A faint breeze flittered through the camp, making her shiver a bit. She wrapped her coat more firmly around her shoulders and took another glance towards the dark forest. She wasn't sure if crickets actually _were_ making the sounds out there, but they sounded enough like them to be oddly comforting.

The fire had long ago burned down to sullen red embers. She stirred them with the same stick that Teal'c had used earlier, brightening them up and getting a bit more heat. She stared down at them, wondering if Jack had looked in his inbox yet and what his reaction had been.

And why had she kissed him? Daniel's questions kept dancing through her brain. On some level, yes, she was worried that kissing him had made her problems worse. Then again, the feelings between them had started far before that kiss. She didn't really see how much more complicated it could have made things. She shivered again, wondering what he'd say when they all got back.

Probably something sarcastic. Or angry. She could see him being angry-after all, she hadn't consulted him before putting in her request.

Hell, she'd be angry, if it had been Daniel, or Teal'c, and they'd gone over her head. A smile touched her lips. Not that either of them would have done something like this. But then, this situation really was unique to her and him. Jack.

She was allowed to call him Jack, here in the middle of nowhere on an alien planet billions of light years from the men who upheld the regulations of the United States Air Force.

It was almost amusing. She was being more introspective on an alien planet than she had been on Earth for more than a year. Of course, the last time she'd thought about this sort of thing, she'd been concussed and on the Prometheus.

Sometimes, she thought she'd made the wrong decision, back then.

Of course, with hindsight, she knew it wasn't that simple. Life was never that simple.

Sam let out a faint laugh. Maybe it wasn't the best idea to make life-altering decisions when one had a head injury. Or maybe she should have talked to the real Jack instead of just a figment of her imagination. A faintly bitter smile twisted her lips as she wondered briefly what it was like to have a normal life.

She looked to the east where a faint lightening of the sky preceded the dawn and checked the time. It was just about time for Teal'c's watch. There was a rustling from the tent and Teal'c looked out.

"Colonel Carter?"

She grinned. "Nice timing."

He smiled, "As I have become accustomed to sleeping rather than kel'no'rim, I have adjusted to awakening on a biological clock."

"Good." Sam considered for a moment as she stretched before climbing into the tent. "Teal'c, do you dream when you sleep?"

"I have begun to." He was silent for a moment, then settled on the log she had vacated and looked at her. "Did you wish to speak of dreams, Colonel Carter?"

"Oh! No. I just..." A twinge from her left knee reminded her that kneeling on the ground was something she wasn't used to. She ignored it and tried to understand what she wanted to say, "I just wonder if the other jaffa, those who now take the tretonin, enjoy dreaming."

He studied her for a moment, then inclined his head, "I have not discussed it with any others."

"Right." Suddenly feeling awkward, and at a loss as to why, Sam scrambled into the tent. "Good night, Teal'c."

"Sleep well, Colonel Carter."

He didn't wish her sweet dreams. And as she fell asleep, she wondered if that was what she wanted.

* * *

"Walter?"

The man nearly dropped his cup of coffee as the carefully controlled voice of the General broke through the silence of his office. "Um, sir?"

"What is this?"

Walter turned and saw Jack gesturing at the pile of papers from his inbox, a certain envelope sitting on top.

"That would be your paperwork, sir. Um, and that memo from the President probably needs to be answered today, because I think-" He shut up at the stormy look that suddenly filled Jack's eyes.

The General reached out and tapped the envelope. "This."

"Um... Colonel Carter left that, sir. Before she went off-world."

"Did she." From the tone of his voice, Walter was certain that a civillian would assume that General O'Neill was calm. Collected. Peaceful. But he had made it his job to read and understand every mood the General exhibited.

And Walter suddenly wished he'd taken the day off. He swallowed. "Yes, sir. Not that I saw her leave it-which I didn't. But I assume she left it this morning, because she was off base last night, and -" He cut himself off, aware that the sudden babbling was as much a defensive reaction as a sign that he should retreat. Now.

"Tell me, Walter, what does it look like to you?"

"Um, well," he fought the need to say something flippant, "I-It looks like transfer papers, sir."

"A request. For a transfer."

"Yes, sir." His voice was almost a whisper.

Jack simply stared into nothing for a long moment while Walter wondered if it might be a good idea to flee for his life. Then again, the General was former Black Ops, he reflected gloomily, finally staying put and giving Jack a look very similar to the one that is directed to a predator by a cornered rodent.

"...sir?" he asked at last, completely unnerved by Jack's silence.

Jack shook himself, looking up at Walter. "I want this held until Colonel Carter returns," he said.

"But, sir-" Walter began.

"I want this held." Jack's tone allowed for no argument. "Colonel Carter is one of my best officers. I want to talk about this with her first. The SGC can't afford to lose her."

Clamping his lips closed on his protest, Walter nodded. He contemplated the manilla folder for a moment, then decided to see how creatively he could lose it. Maybe behind the stack of reports from Dr. Jackson regarding the indigenous life on the last thirty planets he'd been to. Until the Colonel returned, of course. "Yes, sir. It will be held, sir."

"Good." The General stared at the envelope for a moment, then stood. "I'm going to get some cake, Walter. Take five."

"Right, sir, uh, but there's a briefing for -"

The General looked at him, "Tell them I'll be a little late."

"Right, sir."

Jack nodded and strode out, heading for the mess, his mind working a mile a minute. How could she do this to him? He'd known she hadn't been happy, but he'd never thought she would feel driven to take this kind of action. And where would she go? Groom Lake? The Air Force Academy? He snorted to himself. She wouldn't be happy there. The SGC needed Carter and her smarts. He ignored the part of his brain that was loudly insisting that he needed her too.

He sighed. He'd talk to her when she got back and somehow, he'd change her mind. He didn't know how, but somehow, he'd convince her that it was worth her time to stay.

In the meantime, he'd have cake. If the mess staff were still speaking to him. Not that having cake without Carter was quite the same. He sighed. And he really had to stop thinking about her, right now. He was obviously getting pathetic in his old age.


	5. In Which It All Goes To Hell

**The Continuing Misadventures of SG-1 or 101 Things A Girl Can Do.  
**by ALC Punk! and Ryuu  
_Chapter Five: In Which It All Goes To Hell_

It had started when Jones accidentally spilled Daniel's coffee. The young marine had been the receiver of a blistering lecture from a half-awake linguist who kept slipping out of his native tongue while he searched for the correct epithets to use on the hapless young man. Sam had put a stop to it, but the damage had been done. Jones wasn't pissed precisely, but he was edgy, irritated. So she sent him off with Teal'c.

And, dear God, did she wish she hadn't. She liked Daniel, she truly did. Except when he got overly excited and spent four hours explaining to her how fascinating the ruins he was photographing and studying were.

Of course, maybe she shouldn't have wished for something to happen to shut him up.

Because right then, she was missing Daniel's prattle.

Colonel Carter had taken a vantage point on the ledge above the gate, and was watching the two cargo ships below disgorge jaffa. And two Cal warriors. She wanted to close her eyes, but didn't. And a second later, she was glad.

A goa'uld stepped out of the larger shuttle, and stood there, surveying the area. Sam felt a shiver go down her back.

Ba'al.

Was he here just for the hell of it or had she missed the obvious signs and walked straight into an ambush? Sam touched the talk button on her radio and hissed into it as quietly as she could, "Teal'c, Captain, report."

"Yes, sir?" came Jones' calm reply.

"We have a situation here," she said, gritting her teeth in frustration.

"What has happened?" Teal'c's voice asked.

"Apparently the planet isn't as deserted as we thought," Sam said. "Ba'al's decided to show up with a whole bunch of his jaffa and a couple of super soldiers."

"_What_?" Jones yelped, fortunately quietly, adding a belated, "...sir."

"What are your orders, Colonel Carter?" Teal'c asked with a calm she envied.

"Carefully make your way back to camp. Try to avoid getting caught."

"Yes, sir."

If there was sarcasm in the Captain's voice, Sam ignored it. "Daniel's already there. Get everything stowed that you can and then make your way back towards the gate. I'll stay here and watch him. Report if you need to. Carter out."

She clicked off and settled more firmly against the ridge. This was going to be long and boring. With a sigh, she started calculating pi.

This would happen to SG-1, she thought grimly. Especially on a planet that was supposed to be peaceful. She checked her watch. Two hours before the scheduled contact with the SGC. Hopefully, the General wouldn't panic and send twelve teams through the gate after them.

"Sam." Daniel's voice was soft over the radio.

Muffling the sound with her hand, anyway, Sam acknowledged him with a double click.

"I got most of the important equipment stored in the hollow outside of camp."

"Good. Teal'c and Jones are on their way to your position. Stay there."

"Right. Like I'm going to go wander off and play with the invading jaffa."

"You might not, but -" She froze and glanced down into the valley, "I'll get back to you."

"...Sam?" Daniel's worried voice piped up a second later. "Sam, what's wrong? Are you there? Sam!"

She let out a soft, inventive stream of curses that Jack would've been surprised to find that his usually elegant, composed Colonel knew as a familiar blonde head peeked out of one of the cargo ships, clearly searching for Ba'al.

"Daniel?" she managed to choke out.

"Sam! What's going on?"

She swallowed, fighting down her surge of panic, watching the Replicator walk over and speak to the goa'uld with every evidence of familiarity. "We need to get Teal'c and Jones and get the hell out of here. It looks like Ba'al and Eighth have joined forces."

Daniel was silent, and Sam figured that was because he'd either fainted, or was swearing creatively. Either way, this meant the plan changed. There was no way to hide their presence here-and going away from the stargate would merely reduce their chances of surviving. Unless the Replicator wanted new pets.

"That's not good."

"You don't say."

"How long before Jack checks in when we don't?"

"I'd say three hours."

"It's us."

"Fine. Two hours and the five minutes it will take Harriman to tell him we haven't called in."

"Sam?"

"Yes?"

Daniel sounded almost hesitant, "Can she detect our radio transmissions?"

"Probably." Luckily, the blonde and the brunette were simply having a conversation below, while the jaffa patroled the area. "Which is why in five minutes, I'm maintaining radio silence, unless there's an emergency."

There was a long, worried pause. "I'll meet you at the camp, Sam," he said at last.

"Right. Fill Teal'c and Jones in on the situation when you get there." She paused. "Be careful, Daniel. Carter out."

"You too," came the whispered reply.

She took a deep breath and rearranged her grip on her P-90, backing away soundlessly until she could make a silent retreat. Every step of the way, she mentally thanked Jack and his Black Ops training. Hopefully, it would get them through this alive.

* * *

"Why do you think they're here?"

Teal'c didn't answer the inquisitive Daniel Jackson, his body and senses focused on listening for the approach of Colonel Carter-and anything else that might decide to come for a visit.

"I mean, think about it, this is a dead planet. Sam's done some searching, but hasn't found any naquadah, so I don't -"

"Silence."

When a large jaffa asks you to be silent, you go silent. Daniel was no different. He eyed Teal'c for a moment, then glanced at Captain Jones. The Captain wasn't fidgeting or moving, he was just... waiting, was the word Daniel finally decided on. Like Jack used to wait, when he knew he needed to do something, but didn't know what.

There was a tension in the air Daniel understood. His soft questions had been a deliberate vocalization to avoid thinking about the fact that Ba'al was here. Even worse, the idea that the Replicator Fifth had made as a copy of Sam was here. Daniel hadn't met her the last time, but he'd heard enough to know that he didn't want to. And that Sam felt responsible for letting her dupe them.

He pushed away the thought that regretted not updating his will before he'd left. That thought was defeatist and ultimately unhelpful. Plus, Sam or Jack would've knocked him upside the head for giving up that easily. Or at least mocked him for it. Sam had really been influenced by Jack's command style even more than she knew.

There was a faint rustling in the underbrush behind them. The three men tensed up, then visibly relaxed as Sam's head poked up. She smiled grimly. "Good to see you three."

Before the others had a chance to respond, Daniel shifted, aiming his P-90 at her. "So, Sam. What happened the last night we were on Earth?"

She blinked once, then half-smiled. "I beat some idiot named Brad at pool."

"Good enough." He relaxed. While it was still marginally possible that the Replicator had gotten her hands on Sam, he doubted she would have had the time to break her mind and assimilate the information.

"Anyway. It's good to see you."

"Likewise, Colonel Carter," Teal'c replied, inclining his head.

"Sir?"

"Captain?" she asked, turning her head to Jones.

"What should we do?" He squared his shoulders, trying to hide his nervousness. "I mean, I'm not sure we have the firepower to take these guys on, sir."

She nodded. "I don't think we do either, Captain." She thought for a moment. "I'm open to suggestions, but I still think our best option is to see if we can get to the gate first and make a tactical retreat."

"What about Jack?" Daniel asked, "Isn't the SGC due to contact us if we fail to make our daily call?"

"Yes. Unfortunately, I'm not sure Eighth won't detect the radio waves as soon as they begin broadcasting." She shifted, "Any possibility of sending missiles through the gate could be blocked by her-she has the ability to interface with any electronics."

"Missiles?" the Captain asked.

"Like when we took out Moloc," Daniel said. "Wait, Sam, you're not thinking of destroying Ba'al, are you?"

"The thought had crossed my mind."

"Followed by, 'we don't have the manpower or firepower', right, Sam?"

Sam Carter glanced at Teal'c, "Do you think we'll be able to take the gate?"

"I do not."

"Then we hide."

"I do not believe that will suffice, either, Colonel Carter. Once Ba'al and the Replicator learn of our presence with the attempted contact by the SGC, we will become hunted."

Great." Sam closed her eyes for a moment, gathering strength. "So... any suggestions?"

"Um... is there any way to distract them away from the gate?" Daniel asked.

"Maybe one of us could act as... bait, sir?" Jones suggested reluctantly.

"No," Sam replied firmly, hearing a familiar voice insisting that no one got left behind. "That is not an option. We're all getting out of this one, Captain. That's an order."

Jones nodded. "Yes, sir."

"So, what, Sam? We don't know if there's a mothership in orbit, or how Ba'al's controlling the Replicator." Daniel paused, and blinked.

"Controlling her?" Sam frowned, "I suppose it's possible."

"Well, what do we know about Ba'al? We know he's smart, one of the most intelligent System Lords out there. He plans for the long-term, and he's good at thinking on his feet." Remembering the System Lord summit he'd attented, Daniel continued slowly, "He's good at sitting back and just watching."

"Like a spider in a web?"

"Yeah."

"And you believe this indicates Ba'al has discovered some means of controlling the Replicater?" Teal'c asked, sounding almost disturbed.

"Well, it makes a sick sort of sense."

Sam ran a hand through her hair, "But if he is, and if we could get our hands on it..."

Daniel groaned. "Jack's not going to like this."

"If it gets us out of here alive," Sam answered dryly, "I think the General will be ecstatic. It'll keep him from having to fill out more paperwork."

"And you'll get a shiny new toy for the SGC?" Daniel replied, only half-teasing.

"Possibly," she said calmly.

"We don't do anything by halves, do we?" Daniel sighed.

"Indeed not, Daniel Jackson." A smile touched Teal'c's lips.

"We're SG-1, Daniel," Sam began rummaging through her pack. "So. Anyone else but me carrying anything explosive?"

"I have some C4, sir," Jones shrugged when she looked at him. "General O'Neill handed it to me when I was speaking with him. He said we might need it."

"Nice to know Jack always prepares for the worst," said Daniel dryly.

Sam smiled, "Well, I've got C4, detonators, and a few grenades. I like to be prepared, too."

"Great," Daniel said, "So we can blow things up. What now?"

"Now, we do some more surveying, and hope that when the SGC calls, the Replicator isn't paying attention."

"If they call."

Sam eyed Jones, "You doubt the General's ability to decide we're in trouble?"

"It's not that, sir. I mean -" he paused, then straightened, "After your comments to him in the mess hall, sir, I don't know that he'd be quite so, um, over-protective."

Oh. Daniel half-smiled, "Ah, I see the base grapevine is in full swing, still."

The Captain almost flushed.

"We've got jobs to do, people," Sam replied, choosing not to answer Daniel. "Let's get to work."

"Sir, I didn't mean to-" Jones stammered a bit, mentally kicking himself.

"Don't worry about it, Captain. We've just got to focus on getting home."

"Colonel Carter, I believe that if we are to succeed, we will need more help."

"Are you saying what I think you're saying, Teal'c?"

"I believe that any jaffa who is shown the truth will rise against their master. The destruction of the false Gods has already spread to the outskirts of even Ba'al's army."

Sam tilted her head, "Do we have enough time to convert them?"

"We may."

"But can we trust them?"

"No." Daniel said, his tone derisive, "C'mon, guys, this isn't some utopia. They might join us and then betray us the first chance they have."

"Teal'c, your suggestion is valid." Sam began pulling the cameras out of Daniel's pack, "And I'll keep it in mind, but I'm not sure it's feasible at the moment."

"What are you doing to my cameras?"

"Using them for something other than pictures." She removed the batteries, checking the types as she stacked them.

"Sir, a small charge like a zat blast should be enough to set them off." Captain Jones was inspecting one of the smaller batteries.

"We don't have anything for timers, sadly."

"Would this work?" Daniel asked, holding out his watch.

Jones took it and inspected it critically. "It just might. I think I could rig something, anyway."

"But are you sure you want to destroy your watch?" Sam teased.

Daniel shrugged. "I never really liked that watch anyway."

"Okay, fine." She considered for a moment, then nodded decisively. "Teal'c, Daniel, Jones, I want you three make sure our stuff is hidden well, Daniel, if there's anything you have to have, pack it in your vest. Once that's done, wait for the gate to activate. Daniel, I want you to tell the General that our transmissions are being monitored, but if he'd like to toss some grenades through we could use the extra firepower."

"Uh, Sam?"

"I'm not finished yet. Once you're done packing, I want Teal'c to leave the two of you there and attempt to make contact with the jaffa. See if any are amenable to changing sides. If not, zat them."

"And where will you be, Colonel?" Jones was looking at her, eyes blank.

"Throwing a hammer in the works. Hopefully. But before I go off to do that, we need to divide up the C4."

A few minutes later, Jones had the C4, most of the batteries, and all of the timing devices. Sam had the rest. She pulled her radio off and fiddled with it, opening the case.

"Sam, whatcha doin'?"

"The minute the gate opens, and the Replicator picks up the SGC's transmission, they'll know they're not alone. Our element of surprise will be lost."

"Sam!"

"Daniel."

"Take Jones with you."

She sighed. "All right. Fine. I think I'm going to need his help, anyway."

There was a re-distribution of the explosives, then Sam nodded, "Let's go, people."

* * *

Sam glanced over at Jones. "How are you holding up, Captain?" she asked, keeping her voice low as they crept through the tree line.

He managed a grin. "I'm fine, sir. I'd heard about a lot of SG-1's adventures, but I never thought I'd be involved in one."

"Well, let's make sure it's not your last time, okay?" She smiled at him, then signaled to get down as they came to the edge of the tree cover.

He nodded, reflecting that Colonel Carter was a lot less scary when she smiled.

Down below them in the valley, the jaffa and super soldiers mingled, with Ba'al and the Replicator standing to one side. "What a pity we can't drop a house on the wicked witches of Oz," Sam muttered.

"I don't know about a house, sir," Theo shifted and nodded at the two cargo ships, "But what about them?"

The cargo ships sat there in the meadow, gleaming slightly in the sunlight. And Sam felt a smirk take her lips. "You know, Captain, I think I'm beginning to adore you." She glanced at her watch and briefly calculated how much longer before the SGC would try to contact them. "Okay. Here's what we're going to do."

* * *

Walter was really hoping someone else would be on their way to the General's office.

Of course, they weren't. That meant he was the one who had to inform General O'Neill that SG-1 were overdue on their daily contact.

Getting his courage in hand, he made his way up the spiral stairs. And knocked on the door. "General?"

"Walter?" The General looked up from behind the report he was currently reading.

"Um, it's SG-1, sir. They're, uh, overdue."

"What?" Jack looked at his watch. "No contact at all?"

"No sir." Walter began to sweat. "It's been about twenty minutes now."

"Ah." The General looked down at the papers he'd been signing. "Well, I'm sure they're fine, Walter. Thanks for telling me."

Walter blinked in surprise. "Uh, sir, shouldn't we try to contact them?"

"Nah, Colonel Carter probably forgot."

"She wouldn't, sir."

"Maybe she got absorbed in taking her samples."

Suddenly, Walter noticed the odd uncertainty in the man's eyes. "General, official policy is to contact a team if they're overdue by a half hour, correct?"

"Hammond wrote the policy, Walter."

"Well, sir, it's almost been a half hour."

The General threw down his pen and let out an exasperated sigh. "Fine. But it's your fault if the Colonel complains about us being over-protective."

I'll take that risk, sir, Walter thought but didn't say.

Jack watched the man leave. If a man's back could display complete disapproval, Walter's would be shouting it at him. Not that he blamed his assistant. Jack's own reaction had involved immediately going through the gate himself and checking on SG-1. But he couldn't. If Sam didn't think he trusted her to lead, then he had to show her. And the only way to do that was by not running to the rescue whenever it looked like SG-1 was in danger.

He turned his attention back the report, but dropped it back on his desk in disgust after a few minutes. He stood and began to pace, running his fingers restlessly through his hair. Maybe it was something like a radio malfunction or the team suddenly getting caught up in some project.

Yeah, right.

Jack snorted. If SG-1 was involved, it was probably more along the lines of a full-blown apocalypse.


	6. In Which Dorothy Drops A House On The Wi...

**The Continuing Misadventures of SG-1 or 101 Things A Girl Can Do.**  
by ALC Punk! and Ryuu  
_Chapter Six: In Which Dorothy Drops A House On The Wicked Witch Of The East_

Sam crept closer to the cargo ships, watching carefully as the jaffa and super soldiers patrolled. As the only one of the two who could pilot one, she'd been the obvious choice. Jones was waiting to provide her cover, if the distraction of the gate opening wasn't enough.

A glance at her watch told her it was nearly time. She eyed the distance, then prepared herself and started to stand.

"I was wondering when I'd find you again."

The voice came from behind her, and Sam whirled to find the Replicator standing there, studying her with a little grin on her lips. Less than a minute left. Without hesitation, she opened fire on the machine, ripping holes in her with the bullets from the P-90.

"Really, that's not going to do you any good."

As she fired, she stepped closer until she was close enough to touch. Ten seconds. Moving, Sam dove, knocking them both to the ground and shoving the radio deep into the 'wound' she'd created in the Replicator's chest cavity, then rolled away as the creature tried to grab her.

The stargate opened, the sound echoing almost as much as the gunfire had.

"What _were_ you trying to accomplish?" The Replicator sat up and reached into her chest. And the SGC's radio signal activated Carter's radio, which set off the electrical impulse and stimulated the battery.

The explosion scattered Replicator chips everywhere. Sam watched as they began rippling and slowly were drawn back towards the legs still seated on the ground, then turned back towards her goal.

More gunfire told her that Jones was taking care of his side of things, and she tossed all attempts to hide to the side and ran for the smaller cargo shuttle. Two jaffa stepped out and she dropped them with her P-90 without breaking a stride. Then she was inside, and three more fired at her.

Diving behind the nearest cover, she popped up and shot two of them before dropping down again.

The third took a little more time, which gave a fourth time to enter the ship. But he wasn't fast enough to kill her. She toggled the door closed and went for the pilot's seat.

A glance out the front windows showed Jonesplaying a dangerous game of tag with the super soldiers. Oddly, the jaffa were simply standing to one side. Shrugging and shelving the question for later, Sam powered up the ship and sent its nose upwards, angling as hard as she could. It climbed swiftly, and she leveled out and circled once before gauging her target properly.

Then she cut the engines.

Below her, Jones should be firing at Ba'al to keep him distracted. She moved into the back of the ship and smacked a hand on the ring controls only to discover she'd taken them out herself.

"Shit."

Two seconds later she was in an evacuation tube, jettisoning herself. And hoping it would work.

Sam counted the seconds before impact, reaching ten before the pod slammed into the ground. The impact was enough to slam her against the top, and everything went black.

* * *

The young jaffa wasn't sure what had happened. One moment, he had the bespectacled Tau'ri at staff point and completely at his mercy, the next, the shol'vah Teal'c had a zat'nikatel held to the back of his neck and was informing him that Ba'al was a false god and that if he would join the free jaffa, he would be released.

"I would rather die than betray my god!" he managed to gasp defiantly.

"Oh well." Daniel shrugged and watched Teal'c zat the jaffa into unconsciousness. "So, how many is that now, five?"

"They must be given a chance at freedom, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c replied calmly. "They may decide to fight as I have." He suddenly raised his arm and zatted a jaffa who had snuck up behind Daniel and was taking aim.

Daniel turned and blinked. "How about that one?"

"We shall attempt to convert him another day, perhaps."

"Right." Daniel gestured towards the general area of the stargate. "Think Jack will -" He was interrupted as his radio clicked on.

"This is Cobra Commander to Lady Jaye. Come in Lady Jaye."

Daniel made a face and pushed the talk button, "This is Lady Jaye, Cobra Commander, we're currently under fire from an indeterminate number of jaffa -" He broke off as his brain connected the sound he'd heard a second before. "Hang on, CC."

"Daniel Jackson, there has been an explosion."

And the sound of gunfire could clearly be heard. "C'mon, Teal'c." Daniel keyed the radio again, "Listen, guys, we're under fire and a little busy right now. Call us back. Lady Jaye out."

"Wait, Lady Jaye-"

Jack's query was ignored as Teal'c and Daniel took off at a run towards the explosion. They came across the crashed pod first, and opened it to find a woozy Colonel Carter with a small, bloody cut on her forehead.

"Sam!" Daniel helped her out. "What happened?"

"Cargo ship. Crashed." She managed a grin. "Right into Ba'al."

"You dropped a cargo ship on Ba'al's head?" Daniel asked, stunned.

"Yep!" She nodded. "Now I just need ruby slippers to take out his sister."

Daniel stared at her for a moment before grinning and shaking his head.

"Come on, Jones is -" Sam broke off as the Captain in question came crashing through the trees.

"Colonel! It worked!" He was grinning, "I don't think anyone could have survived that."

"What about the jaffa and super soldiers?"

"One of them was close enough to get caught in the crash. The other one is probably right behind me. The jaffa didn't seem all that interested in following me."

"Then let's move, people."

Teal'c took point and they headed back towards the stargate. As they neared it, a troop of jaffa appeared. "Your God is dead." Teal'c informed them as they leveled their staffs at SG-1.

"You are the shol'vah," the one in the lead said. He appeared almost uncertain. "It is not possible for our God to be dead."

"That's what they all say," Daniel noted.

Sam glanced around, suddenly uneasy. "Where is the drone?"

As if on cue, the black-clad form of a Cul warrior stepped into the clearing and leveled its weapon at SG-1.

"Thanks, Sam," Daniel said caustically. "Next time, could you wait until-"

The drone opened fire, its first shots missing everyone. SG-1 dove for cover, Sam and Teal'c rolling easily and coming up to fire at the super soldier. Their shots didn't do more than make it stagger slightly.

"Well, hell," Sam heard Daniel mutter.

She glanced at him to find him standing and throwing something.

A moment later, a tremendous explosion shook the area, and the super soldier was thrown back several feet and slammed into a tree.

"Sir! I've got an idea."

"Make it fast, Jones," she snapped as the drone returned to its feet and began stalking towards their position.

"Won't be a second, sir." A moment later, he was up and running, skirting the clearing and staying out of the sights of the super soldier as it fired repeatedly at the rest of SG-1. Sam and Teal'c returned fire, but really didn't do much to stop it.

Sam watched in horror as the young captain suddenly appeared behind the drone and walked up to it, grabbed the back of its armor and shoved something inside of it before turning and running as the creature started to whirl around to counter this new attack. She jumped up and yelled at the drone, "HEY!"

It stopped, confused, and that was all the time Jones needed to get back into cover.

The super soldier fired at her, and she dropped flat, regretting the move to break cover, but knowing it had been needed.

And then a concussion ripped through the air, and she felt as though the ground had dropped out from underneath her as the sound slammed through her. Something clanked as it landed nearby, but she didn't hear it.

"Colonel Carter!" Teal'c sounded like he was whispering. Then he was grabbing her, hauling her backwards as the half-destroyed drone reached for her.

Jones and Daniel continued firing at the near-dead super soldier until it stopped moving.

The silence was deafening.

Sound suddenly snapped back into being, and Sam shook her head. "You can put me down, Teal'c."

"Indeed." He sounded almost amused as he set her gently on her feet.

"All of you shall be taken to our lord!" The lead jaffa announced, as if they hadn't just been fighting for their lives against the drone.

Teal'c faced them commandingly. "Your god is dead," he repeated. "You are free to join us and fight against the goa'uld who have enslaved you."

"Gods do not die," the lead jaffa announced, a bit desperately.

"Oh, this one did," Daniel said, nodding. "Smashed nice and flat right under his own cargo ship."

"We need to go." Gesturing with her P-90, Sam tilted her head and asked the jaffa, "Do you believe your God is false?"

"I do-I..." The lead jaffa faltered.

"Then let us pass. All we really want to do is get to the stargate and leave."

"No!" Two of the jaffa stepped forward, raising their staff weapons. "For if you have indeed killed our God, then you shall suffer."

Two bullets.

Daniel looked at the fallen men and glanced at Sam, "I was going to zat them."

"Not enough time." She looked at the rest, "Are you going to get in our way?"

The remaining jaffa looked at the four grim-faced tau'ri and stepped back.

"Thank you." Sam nodded and led her team away.

"Wait..."

She turned back to find the lead jaffa stepping forward and readjusted her grip on her weapon. "What?"

"I... I wish to go with you," he replied, nodding his head.

"Why?"

He swallowed, then straightened, "I have heard tales of the shol'vah and the tau'ri for nearly eight years now. In the beginning, Ba'al would -"

"Fine," Sam cut him off, "You can tell us the story while we walk. Teal'c, you're on point. Daniel, then Jones, our new friend, then me. Let's go before the Replicator gets herself back together."

"My lord Ba'al -" The jaffa interrupted. "He could control the woman. The one who looks like you."

"We were right," Daniel murmured.

"How?"

"There was a device in his ship, he uses his gravity," he frowned. "Engine?"

"Gravity engine." Sam tilted her head, "That -"

"Wait, Sam," Daniel waved a hand, "That's really familiar. Jack used to tell me about a device Ba'al used when he was captured. It altered the center of gravity."

"If we could get that..." Sam looked up at the jaffa. "So, you know where this thing is?"

"Yes."

"Will you take us there?" Sam asked, starting to smile.

He nodded. "Indeed."

Sam gestured ahead. "Lead on-uh, what is your name?"

"Mat'rik," he replied, looking oddly shy.

"Mat'rik." She nodded. "I'm Samantha. Welcome aboard."

They spread out again, Mat'rik moving forward at a gesture from Sam. Daniel watched the woods around them as the jaffa led them back to the site of the landing. It occurred to him to wonder where the other jaffa were, but since they hadn't appeared-and there was still no sign of a mothership-he was content to let the question rest.

A thought occurred to Sam and she stepped forward, beckoning Theo aside. "A word, Captain?"

"Sir?"

She walked beside him, waving at Mat'rik and the rest of the team to stay ahead, then gave Theo a stern look. "You realize that you were extraordinarily lucky just then, Captain Jones?"

"Sir?" he asked again, clearly attempting to maintain an innocent, polite demeanor. Sam snorted inwardly. Did he really think she'd fall for that move?

"Blowing up that super soldier was very brave, Captain." Her tone became harder. "It was also very reckless."

A look of mingled guilt and rebellion flashed over his face so quickly that anyone else might have missed it. "With respect, sir, I didn't see any other option to get us out alive. I felt it was worth the risk."

"It wasn't, Captain," Sam replied, suddenly feeling a retroactive stab of sympathy for Jack. She tried to keep her voice even, although what she wanted was to reach out and shake the knowledge of what a stupid risk he'd taken into him. "Your life is too valuable to throw away on a foolish risk."

"Sir-"

"Every member of this team is important, Captain," she interrupted, her expression serious. "They aren't expendable and neither are you. Got it?"

He paused, then quietly replied, "Yes, sir. I understand."

She nodded. "Good. Then we won't have this discussion again, will we, Captain?"

Theo shook his head, respect deep in his eyes. "No, sir."

Her expression softened faintly. "Good." The two officers lengthened their stride, catching up to the rest of SG-1.

Once they were within sight of the clearing, Sam scanned it with her field glasses, studying the still-smoking wreck of the cargo ship for a moment before moving to the other one. Two jaffa stood, guarding it.

There was no sign of either of the other super soldier, and Sam took a brief moment to hope that the one left had been underneath the crashed ship and was now dead. She doubted it, but hope was always a good commodity to have on hand. "Where is this device?"

Mat'rik shifted, "There were two. One was in his cargo ship, the other was his hand."

"Hand." Sam frowned, then glanced at Teal'c for a translation.

"Mat'rik refers to the hand device all goa'uld wear, Colonel Carter."

"Ah. And that would be buried in the crash with him."

"Indeed."

"The one in the shuttle, does it require the hand device?"

"This, I do not know."

"Damn."

"Sam, where's the Replicator?" Daniel had been studying the site, searching for the elusive blonde head of the creature that had nearly killed his friends.

"In pieces still, hopefully."

"What?"

"We blew her up." She explained.

He blinked. "Um... how?"

"MacGyvered the radio's batteries. Shot a hole in her chest and tossed it in." Sam gestured eloquently. "When the SGC contacted us, she went boom."

Daniel nodded. "Nice. Any ideas on how long it'll take her to get back together?"

"Nope." Sam shot a quick worried glance back at Daniel.

"So... we should get this device very quickly, then?"

Sam nodded.

It was simple to zat the two guards and then the five of them filed into the bridge of the cargo ship. It was quite ornate, but in an understated way. Sam eyed it, a little surprised. She was used to the goa'uld tendency to be all glitter and glam. This was more designer interior.

"Over here." Mat'rik pointed at a console.

"Jones, watch the door."

"Yes, ma'am."

Sam inspected the panel with Daniel looking over her shoulder. "Any ideas?"

"Got an instruction manual?"

She shot him a look, then sighed, "Mat'rik did you ever see him use this?"

"Yes." Moving over, he gestured. "He would place his right hand into the depressions here, and it would come on."

"Okay." Sam considered, then placed her hand into the correct spot, feeling the slight ridges and dips. Nothing happened. No dancing lights, no indication. "Damn. He must have it calibrated for -" She paused, feeling the ridges. "For a hand wearing a hand device."

"So, we need a hand device," Daniel said.

"Yeah."

"But the only hand device here -"

"Is buried under a cargo ship attached to a dead God." Sam completed for him.

"We must dig, then," Teal'c stated.

Sam frowned. "But do we have that much time?"

"If this thing works-" Daniel began.

"It's worth the risk." She nodded. "And it might even be possible to reverse-engineer a version that people without naquadah in their blood can use." She looked away and softly finished, "I owe the Asgard that much at least."

"Sam-"

"Let's get digging," she replied quickly.

"Any way to blow the wreckage out of the way?" Daniel asked hopefully.

"Not unless you want to risk blowing up the hand device too," Sam answered.

With care, they moved across to the crashed ship and began inspecting the debris field. Sam set Jones, Mat'rik and Teal'c to digging through while she and Daniel kept an eye out for anything hostile.

"Colonel Carter."

She glanced at Teal'c. "What is it?"

"Large portions of the metal of the cargo ship appear to be eroded."

"Show me."

The metal hadn't been like that when she crashed the ship. Large chunks were gone, as if acid had burned it. Or it had been eaten. "dammit."

"What?"

"There could be more Replicators on the planet than her now." Sam moved back to stand with Daniel. "Keep working." A sense of dread touched her. This was a machine with her own memories and motivations. It was highly possible she'd already recovered the hand device. Which was a thought that really didn't bear thinking about.


	7. In Which Daniel is Squicked

**The Continuing Misadventures of SG-1 or 101 Things A Girl Can Do.**  
by ALC Punk! and Ryuu  
_Chapter Seven: In Which Daniel is Squicked_

Jack eyed the radio in annoyance and concern as the stargate cut off. Daniel had answered which meant that Carter was probably out risking her life for the good of the team. And, while there was no one he'd rather have watching his back than Carter, he also knew that the gunfire and various explosions he'd heard over the radio argued that SG-1 was potentially in far more trouble than they could get themselves out of even with a commander as brilliant and resourceful as Colonel Carter.

He stared at the now-deactivated stargate, fighting the intense urge to jump through and save them himself. Not only did he have no idea what he was getting into, but it would fuel even more rumors about General O'Neill and his overprotectiveness towards Colonel Carter and SG-1.

"Sir?"

Jack looked up to find Walter regarding him. "Walter?"

"Sir, what should we do? It sounds like they need help."

"You're right," Jack replied, instantly coming to a decision. It didn't matter if he was worrying too much or if Carter would be mad at him later. "Tell SG-3 to arm themselves for heavy combat and prepare to go to SG-1's assistance. And have the infirmary standing by for possible casualties."

"Yes, sir!" Walter replied, snapping off one high-class salute.

Jack nodded.

Carter could be angry with him all she wanted later, he decided. At least she and SG-1 would be alive to get pissed.

* * *

Thanks to the metal fatigue, digging into the cargo ship had been a lot easier than it could have been. Jones had figured out where he thought Ba'al should be, and the three of them were concentrating on that while Daniel and Sam patroled.

So far there still had been no sign of the other jaffa. Sam was beginning to wonder if they'd all decided to desert, or were waiting for the right moment to attack. The uncertainty was making her jumpy. And finally, she looked at Daniel, "Go help them dig."

"You sure?" He made a face.

"C'mon, Daniel, an archeologist afraid of digging is like..." She trailed off unable to come up with the perfect analogy.

"Like a river afraid of flowing?" He suggested dryly.

"That works."

Sam continued to scan the tree-line while they dug.

Grimacing at the amount of metal the three men had already moved, Daniel joined them in their task. The metal felt curious, as if it would dissolve in an instant. Of course, it didn't, which meant they were stuck digging it out with bare hands.

"Daniel Jackson," Teal'c said, "I believe I have found part of the remains of Ba'al."

"He truly was a false God," Mat'rik said, his voice soft.

"Indeed."

"C'mon, guys, let's find that device before the Replicator shows up. And watch out in case the symbiote is still alive."

Glancing at them, Sam half-smiled. "Good job, guys."

"I'm afraid they're a little too late," A hand closed on the back of her uniform, and Sam found herself flying through the air to slam into the ground. God. She closed her eyes against the searing pain in her side and rolled, trying to get to her feet before the Replicator made contact with her again.

"I'm afraid there's no Glinda, Dorothy." The creature who looked like her mocked, "You're going to die, and then your little dogs will, too."

"Screw you."

"Do you know how long it took me to get back together after your little stunt?"

"About three hours," Sam replied, dodging and discovering that the Replicator moved too damned fast. "Kind of slow. Maybe you're getting old?"

"Sam!"

"I'm a little busy right now, Daniel." She ducked away from another punch and came up firing.

The Replicator gave a contemptuous laugh and spread her arms. "That tickles."

Where the impact sites blossomed across her torso, little sparks took hold and immediately the gaps began to close.

"But, Sam-oh, EW."

"Daniel, I'm -" She swore as her clip ran out. Without another one, she wasn't going to have any luck against her nemesis.

"Fire!" The voice was new, familiar, and male.

Sam danced backwards away from the Replicator, and someone opened fire. A glance to her right showed two of the marines from SG-3, P-90s aimed competently at the machine.

"Here." Daniel thrust something at her. "It's a little slimy, but it should work."

"What?" For a moment, she stared at the twist of metal, then slid her hand into it, adjusting to the feel of the wires against her skin. "I have no idea how to use this, Daniel."

"It can't be that different from a normal hand device. Just try, Sam."

Try, he said, irritated, she raised her hand, palm out. For a second, nothing. Then an electrical charge ran up her arm, and a blast slammed into the Replicator, who staggered, but didn't go down.

She did, however, turn, "Oh, isn't this interesting."

More irritation flowed through Sam, and the second blast actually knocked the Replicator over. Sam didn't give her time to rise, striding across the battlefield, pushing outwards, suddenly _feeling_ the difference in texture between Replicator and ground. There was something else, on the edge, but she couldn't decipher it for the moment. The force pinned the machine to the ground, although she struggled.

"I see you're finally reaching your full potential."

"Shut up."

"But, it's not," Eighth rolled, breaking the hold of the hand device, and staggered to her feet. "Going to be enough."

A curious sensation passed through her body. As if she were standing outside of it, her palm reached out and touched the chest of the Replicator, "That's where you're wrong."

Daniel watched in surprise as the Replicator froze in place, Sam's hand holding it in place. "Good job, Sam."

"Thanks," there was strain in her voice, "But I'm not sure-"

"Not good enough." The words were wrenched out painfully, and then the Replicator swung her arm. The motion was slow, but the force behind it slammed into Sam's face, and her concentration was broken as she staggered backwards.

Daniel caught her. "Maybe Ba'al was wrong?"

"I don't know."

The marines opened fire, distracting the Replicator again. Or just making her amused. Daniel didn't care which. "Well, we know that Ba'al had to have some sort of control. Something that he thought gave him the edge."

"Maybe she played him." There was a bitterness in Sam's voice that made Daniel look at her sharply. Her eyes were shadowed with something he recognized.

"Sam..." But this wasn't the time for this sort of conversation. "Look, maybe Ba'al calculated wrong. Or he had a finer control. Something you haven't had time to learn. Or, maybe it has to be used with the other machine in the ship, or -"

"Control," Sam whispered, her eyes widening. "Of course."

"Sam?"

She stepped forward, pointing the hand device at Eighth. "Control..." she murmured, half to herself. She could hear Daniel calling out faintly behind her. She pushed his voice away from her awareness and tried to place her entire focus on the Replicator and on the device on her palm that was beginning to grow warmer. She felt fury rise within her and let it come, focusing it and imagining it as a hot, steady stream pouring down her arm and out at the being in front of her.

"Sam! Are you crazy?" Daniel watched in horror as one of his dearest friends moved closer and closer to what was proving itself to be an unstoppable killing machine. "Sam! You-" he broke off as a bright beam shot from the hand device and surrounded Eighth, knocking her backwards and forcing a pained cry from the Replicator.

The fury sustained her, pulsed down the beam and Sam began tightening it, imagining the equations that would force gravity into a beam, splashing outwards to surround its subject. Gravity, or power. Something that the Replicator couldn't absorb and turn to her own ends. Higher math, something to hang her concentration on. The intricacies of cosines, imaginary numbers, and a Replicator slowly being torn apart.

It started with a few small blocks, falling down like drops of water. They were inert, Sam didn't even have to check them to be certain.

Somehow, the device was ripping apart the energy that connected them. Later, she could figure it out. Right now, she just had to maintain her pressure on it. Which wasn't hard, considering how angry she'd been at the betrayal of herself. "I should have known better." The words came out before she could stop them, boiling to the surface as more and more blocks began dripping to the ground. "But you were so very like me. So very damaged. And I was so curious..."

"You were so easy. Weak." The words ended on another scream, this one almost inhuman. "What are you doing to me?"

"Killing you."

"Uh, Sam..."

Amazingly, the Replicator dragged herself to her feet and began struggling forwards, towards Sam. "You can't win, you know."

Sweat beaded on Sam's brow, soaking the back of her shirt. "You'd be surprised what I can and can't do." She pushed with the beam, and Eighth staggered. "What was it you said? Untapped potential?"

"Letting your morals slide, are you?" The words were taunting.

"Only for you, darling."

"I feel so..." A pause, as if she was beginning to lose the ability to think coherently, "...special."

The blocks were landing on the ground in a steady stream, one after the next. The sound was akin to the rain on a sandy beach. The Replicator was losing body mass, her skin peeling back to reveal deeper layers of skin and metal.

A high-pitched whine accompanied the impact of the first staff-blast, and Sam fought to keep her concentration as Daniel dragged her down in an attempt to find cover. More blasts began peppering the area, and SG-3 did a neat about-face and began firing on the attacking jaffa. Several blasts hit the Replicator, and she seemed to arch into them, suddenly smirking.

"So, you want to play with the big guns, little girl?"

Before Sam could react, the Replicator moved, breaking free of the beam.

Then Daniel was firing on her, the bullets from his P-90 ripping into the already eroded frame. Her left arm went, then her right, the chips scattering even more when Sam reacted by lashing them with the hand device. Their connectivity severed, they lay inert.

"It's only a flesh wound," the Replicator mocked, still moving forward.

Daniel's next targets were her head and torso, and she began to dissolve faster and faster, Sam's use of the hand device turning them into a pile of silicon dust.

Within a minute, there was nothing to indicate there had been the simulacrum of a woman standing in front of them. "Well," Daniel turned and glanced over his shoulder to see Teal'c and Mat'rik speaking to the jaffa. "That was anti-climactic."

"Works for me," Sam whispered. She turned and staggered, falling to her knees. Daniel was at her side instantly, helping her to her feet.

"You okay, Sam?"

"Tired," she murmured. "Just tired."

Daniel grinned affectionately at her. "I can't imagine why." He slid his arm under her shoulders, supporting her. "C'mon... let's get you home, Colonel Carter. You've definitely earned your paycheck today."

She shot him a weary smile. "Let's get that gravity engine first."

"You got it, Sam." Daniel helped her stagger to the remaining cargo ship.

"Colonel Carter," Teal'c appeared at their side. "These jaffa wish to make amends for their attempt to attack us." He sounded almost sardonic. "I believe they are considering joining the ranks of the rebel jaffa."

"Really?"

"I do not, however, trust them."

Sam nodded and stepped away from Daniel as they entered the ship. "Well, can we take them to a neutral planet where members of the rebel jaffa could speak with them?"

"Yes."

"Right." She stopped in front of the console, studying it.

"Colonel Carter?"

She glanced up and met Colonel Reynolds' eye. "Colonel."

He shifted, straightening, "SG-3 and I are here to get you out, sir."

"Thanks." She looked back at the console, tracing one hand over the side trying to find the connections. "Colonel, if I program the coordinates in, do you think you and your men would survive the journey to Earth in this ship?"

"Is that wise?" Daniel asked, "I mean, there could be some sort of fail safe device here."

"There is not." replied Mat'rik, who had apparently joined them out of interest. "Ba'al detested such subterfuges."

Sam considered, "How about this. We send the ship to the Alpha Site. That's close enough for us to get people through the gate to study it."

"Well, why not just leave it here?" Reynolds asked.

"Because there's one of Ba'al's super soldiers out there." Sam frowned, "Although I'm not certain why it hasn't attacked us."

"Then let's get the hell off this planet before it does?" Daniel suggested.

"Good plan." Sam nodded. "We'll hike back to the stargate with our new friends and send them on their way first." She paused. "Although... Mat'rik?"

"...Colonel Samantha?" the jaffa asked hesitantly.

She grinned. "I'd like you to go with Colonel Reynolds to the Alpha Site. We already have several rebel jaffa there. You'd fit right in."

He smiled and nodded. "I would be honored, Colonel Samantha."

"Good." She found what she needed and began programming the data she needed into the ship.

"Colonel Samantha," Daniel murmured, straightening his glasses. "I like it."

"I'm glad you do, Daniel." She typed a last string of digits into the computer. "But you don't get to call me that."

"Uh, Sam?" Daniel watched as Colonel Reynolds and SG-3 filed into the cargo ship, looking around them with distaste. Reynolds looked like he wanted to object to her decisions, but hadn't said anything. Maybe he wanted a vacation.

"Tell me on the walk to the gate," she replied absently.

"Look, Colonel Carter," Reynolds moved towards them. "The SGC sent us to retrieve you, not-"

"Serve as glorified shuttle pilots?" She asked, her tone cool. "Well, I'm sorry, Colonel, but this technology needs to be studied to find out how to duplicate it. It could become an invaluable tool in our fight against both the Replicators and the goa'uld."

"Colonel, with all due respect, General O'Neill put me in charge."

"Fine." She smiled at him.

Daniel looked around, wondering if there would be a place to hide from the coming apocalypse.

"Colonel Reynolds, you and your team will escort the jaffa back to the gate, Teal'c will go with you and all of you will gate to the site Teal'c knows about. Proceed back to the SGC from there. Daniel, Captain Jones, Mat'rik and I will fly the cargo ship to the Alpha Site." Sam glanced around. "Any objections?"

Reynolds managed to get out a terse, "No, Colonel." He looked like he was about to choke.

"Good." She nodded. "Give my regards to General O'Neill when you return and tell him I'll have the rest of SG-1 home in a couple of days."

"Yes, Colonel Carter." Reynolds turned and snapped orders out to his team, many of whom shot Sam sidelong glances filled with newfound respect. They filed out to take command of their new charges.

"Colonel." Jones saluted, a faint smile fluttering over his face. "Should I go retrieve the rest of our supplies, sir?"

"What about the drone?" Daniel asked, eyeing the retreating marines.

"I've been wondering that myself," she replied. A faint frown touched her lips. "It's just possible that these drones were of the earlier generation-perhaps it self-destructed from exhaustion or heart failure."

"Possible," acknowledged Daniel.

"Either way, it doesn't matter. Jones, take Mat'rik with you. And if you see the super soldier, dodge. I've noticed they're a little near-sighted."

"Yes, sir. C'mon, Mat'rik."

A few minutes after the two had gone off, Daniel decided to focus on something that was bothering him. "So, Sam..."

Looking up from the console she had gone back to poking at, Sam blinked, "Daniel?"

"You're still wearing the hand device." Maybe the oblique approach would work.

"Huh? Oh." The Lieutenant Colonel stared down at her right hand then slowly began removing it. "I'd forgotten it was there."

"Ah."

"Daniel."

"Sam."

A smile touched her lips, "Just tell me, Daniel."

"Nothing," he crossed his arms, "I just... think you should be careful with that thing."

She handed the device over, wordlessly acknowledging what he hadn't said. "Here. I want you to hold on to it."

Daniel studied her for a moment, then nodded. "You've really put in a day, haven't you?" he commented softly.

"Oh, I think you guys did your bit," she replied, amused. "Just all in a day's work for SG-1."

"Yeah." Daniel slipped the hand device into a pocket. "We're the coolest."

* * *

"She did _what_?"

Colonel Reynolds shifted a little, feeling vaguely uncomfortable. "She took the ship to the Alpha Site, sir."

The General ran his hands over his face, "Let me get this straight. I send you through on a rescue mission and instead of coming home with you, Colonel Carter goes to the Alpha Site."

"Yes, sir."

"Did she not understand the part of her orders that said she was supposed to come home?"

Reynolds coughed, "Actually, sir, I never mentioned that."

"You didn't."

"No." Straightening even more, Reynolds continued, "You see, sir, Colonel Carter was-is-right. If that device can be used against the Replicators and the Goa'uld, it's invaluable, and needs to be studied."

"So, _she_ went to the Alpha Site instead of _you_ and your team," Jack commented mildly.

"Er, yes, sir." Reynolds shifted uncomfortably. "I guess she felt that she and Mat'rik would be better able to handle the ship than SG-3."

Jack blinked. "Mat'rik? Who's Mat'rik?"

"One of Ba'al's jaffa who she convinced to switch sides, sir."

Jack shook his head. "Who's she bringing home next?" he muttered half to himself, "The Cowardly Lion?"

"Sir?"

Jack sighed. "Never mind. Thank you. Dismissed, Colonel."

"Thank you, sir." Reynolds saluted and exited Jack's office.

Jack shook his head again. Trust SG-1 to turn a simple mineral survey into an all-out battle against two of Earth's nastier enemies. And trust Carter and her team to come up with a way to take them both out. Jack allowed himself a quiet, proud smile at the preliminary reports he'd heard of SG-1's latest escapade. When Carter wanted to prove a point to him, he reflected wryly, she didn't mess around.

"Sir?"

Glancing up at Walter, Jack blinked, "What is it?"

"You have a meeting in ten minutes with Major Davis, and SG-18 wants to know if you've decided on the correct disposition of the artifacts Major Dallas brought back."

"Ah." Jack considered for a moment, "Where's Teal'c?"

"He's still getting checked out in the infirmary."

"Well, have him report to my office as soon as he's done. And tell Davis to get his ass in here."

"And SG-18?"

"Tell them to all go home. It's pointless to do anything until I've asked Dr. Jackson's opinion."

"Ah. Right, sir." Walter turned, then stopped, "And, sir?"

"Yes?"

"I'm glad she's all right."

Jack gave Walter a rare smile. "I am too."

Walter nodded and started to walk out.

"Walter?"

He turned back. "Sir?"

"Carter's transfer papers... put them on my desk."

Walter's eyebrows shot up. "Sir?"

"Well, I have to have them handy while I talk her into letting me tear them up, don't I?" Jack asked.

A rare smile broke across the sergeant's face. "Yes, sir!"


	8. In Which SG1 Gets Home and What Happens ...

**The Continuing Misadventures of SG-1 or 101 Things A Girl Can Do.**  
by ALC Punk! and Ryuu  
_Chapter Eight: In Which SG-1 Gets Home and What Happens After That_

"So, it'll be nice to get home, won't it, Captain?"

Jones looked up to find his CO smiling at him. He grinned back. "Yes, sir. Not that this hasn't been, er, interesting."

"Not at all your usual mineral survey, is it?"

Jones gestured over at the cargo ship, which was still being swarmed over by excited techs. "Still looks like we did some good, sir."

"We sure did." Sam's smile widened. "Thor just contacted us. The Asgard are very interested in helping us develop Ba'al's toy into a full-blown weapon." She paused for a moment. "And I wanted to ask you, Captain-"

"Sir?"

She ran a hand through her hair. "I was impressed by how you handled yourself on this mission. I'd have to talk to the rest of SG-1 and General O'Neill, of course, but I wondered if you'd be interested in joining SG-1 on a permanent basis?"

"Sir-" Jones paused and stared at her for a moment. "You... you want me on SG-1?"

"If that's all right with you, Captain," she replied, sounding amused.

"Of course it's all right, sir!"

"Good." She smiled again, then glanced at the cargo ship. "Have you seen Daniel?"

"I think he said something about going to the supply room for batteries."

"Batteries... Oh. For his cameras." The smile changed to a slight smirk, "Well, he'll have to wait until we get back to Earth, then. I don't think the Alpha Site carries the right ones. Why don't you go retrieve him. Take Mat'rik with you, I'm sure he'd love a tour."

"Yes, sir, Colonel Samantha, sir."

Her chuckles followed him across the hangar bay.

* * *

"It's SG-1's IDC, sir!" Walter called out.

"Well, open the iris, then." General O'Neill couldn't stop the smile that crossed his face as Sam stepped through the wormhole, followed by her team. "Welcome home, SG-1!"

She looked down the ramp and smiled, snapping off a perfect salute along with Captain Jones. "Good to be home, sir."

"We debrief in one hour, SG-1. Infirmary's standing by to check you out."

Sam waved at Theo and Daniel. "You guys take the showers first. I'll catch up with you."

"Thank you, sir." Jones grinned and walked off with Daniel.

Jack caught Sam's shoulder. "Can I have a quick word with you in my office, Colonel?"

She nodded. "Of course, sir. I, um, think you have some papers up there that I need to tear up anyway."

They were both silent as he led the way up through the control room and into his office. "Sit down, Colonel."

With something approaching a tired sigh, she collapsed into the chair. "Sir, about -"

"You were right."

She blinked at him.

Jack half-smiled, "I'm not good at letting things go, Carter."

"No, really?" She asked. But she didn't sound angry.

Fiddling with a corner of the envelope, he made himself meet her eyes. "I hate sending you out there without me. But I trust you to get the job done." A smirk. "Even if the people I send to help you out make it difficult."

"Ah." She leaned forward and picked up the envelope, and looked down. "Sir... I'm not sure how to say this. I-I don't want to be under your command anymore, but I don't want to leave SG-1." Blue eyes met his, "We kissed, sir. And I'm tired of pretending I want to wait."

He studied her hand on the edge of his desk, then reached out and gently covered it with his own. "I'm tired of it too, Carter." His fingertips lightly stroked her knuckles. "Are you asking me to retire?"

She closed her eyes. "Yes... no... I don't know, sir." She sighed. "No. The SGC needs you. No one knows more about running this place than you do."

"And I won't risk your career, Carter." His eyes were serious. "Either we do this openly or we don't do it at all."

"So, what do we do?" she whispered.

"You go down to the infirmary and get checked out." Jack looked at the envelope. "I'm going to use my paper shredder and make some calls."

She stood, swaying for a moment, then steadied herself. "Huh. I think I'm a little more tired than I thought I was."

"Gonna make it down there all right?"

"Yes." She turned and headed for the door. "I'll see you at the briefing, sir."

Jack waited until she was gone, then reached for the phone. "Hi. Get me General Hammond, please."

* * *

"So, I've heard SG-3's reports on your adventure," Jack said, looking around the briefing table at his favorite team, "and I've seen the reports that the tech guys sent back from the Alpha Site. Apparently you kids have got the Asgard drooling with your find." He grinned proudly at them. "Carter, they specifically want to talk to you about demonstrating the weapon for them and the Tok'ra seem to be interested as well."

"I'd be glad to, sir." Sam smiled.

Jack nodded. "So, I know you all have official reports to write, but is there anything you wanted to add now?"

"Permission speak freely, sir?"

"Granted, Colonel."

Sam looked at her team. "I think I speak for all of us here when I say, 'Peaceful planet,' my ass, sir."

Jack grinned. "I think that sums it up."

"I'd also like to note, for the record, that Captain Jones conducted himself admirably out there. And, if the rest of SG-1 agrees, with your permission, I'd like to request he be permanently assigned as our fourth."

Jack raised his eyebrows as the young Captain flushed. "Daniel? Teal'c?"

"I think he did well," Daniel grinned, "He didn't tell me to shut up, ever."

"Unlike me?" suggested the General with a smirk.

"Unlike you, Jack."

"Teal'c?"

"I have no objections. Captain Jones did indeed do well on his first outing with SG-1." Teal'c let a rare smile grace his lips. "It would be an honor to have him become a permanent member."

"Well, if you have no objections, Captain?"

"No, sir!" The Captain was practically bursting with pride.

"Very well, I'll see to the paperwork right away." Jack made a notation on the pad Walter insisted he use. "Now, there's one other thing. I don't want to drop this on you without letting you decide, but, there's currently an idea floating around that a few SG teams be assigned to the Alpha Site. I would like one of them to be SG-1. This would mean you'd be stuck there for weeks, and you'd travel to your destinations from there instead of the SGC."

Sam blinked and stared at him for a moment. "But then we... we technically wouldn't be under your command anymore, would we, sir?"

Jack shook his head. "No, Colonel. The SG teams at the Alpha Site would fall under the command of the Department of Homeworld Security and General Hammond." He smiled.

She took a deep breath. "I...I think SG-1 needs to discuss this matter privately before coming to a decision, sir. I couldn't possibly make this choice without the unanimous support of my team."

"Of course, Colonel." Jack nodded. "Good job, SG-1, and congratulations, Captain."

"Thank you, sir!" Jones still looked positively giddy. "It's an honor."

"If that's it, Jack, I don't think Sam's eaten since yesterday."

"Daniel!"

"Well, c'mon, Sam, you haven't."

She continued to glare at him.

"Er, yeah, that's it. Dismissed." Jack eyed them. "All four of you are to go straight to the mess and eat. I've heard there's very good mashed potatos. And if you saw the paperwork that went into procuring them..."

"Yes, sir." Carter saluted and stood, "C'mon, guys."

"Sam?" Daniel caught her arm as the others left the room.

"I've been ordered to eat, Daniel."

"This is about the pool game, isn't it." Not a question, his gaze was steady on her.

"I'm tired, Daniel."

"Yeah." He half-smiled and gestured, "So is Jack. C'mon, let's go eat."

* * *

Sam was so absorbed in the notes that she was making on her laptop about Ba'al's weapon that she completely missed the sound of someone clearing their throat behind her. A hand lightly clasped her shoulder a moment later, causing her to jump and let out a startled yelp.

"Shit! Sorry, Carter."

She turned to find Jack regarding her sheepishly.

"It's all right, sir," she gasped, trying to get her heart rate back under control. "Can I help you?"

"Dr. Brightman informed me that it was probably a good idea for someone else to give you a ride home unless you were planning on staying here tonight." He looked at her curiously.

"Oh. Yeah, I did want to go home. Haven't seen it for a few days." She smiled tiredly.

"Well, then." Jack held up his keys. "I am here to be your personal chauffeur."

Suddenly, _very_ inappropriate thoughts flashed through her mind as she stared at him. Then she shook herself. "Oh. Right, sir. Just let me pack this stuff up." And stop imagining having sex with you. On my table. And couch. Oh, Lord. Sam was really hoping she wasn't blushing.

Maybe it was the fact that they had both admitted they were tired of waiting. So her brain was already conjuring up what it wanted to do.

Not that this was the first time she'd considered it, of course.

"Right, Carter. I'll be... Over here." He moved and began fiddling with some random thing on her desk.

It would probably have helped if there wasn't something so tired and cute about him in blue jeans and a leather jacket. Sexy. Dammit. Firmly shoving the thought away, Sam concentrated on shutting down her laptop and making sure she had her notes packed and ready to go. She'd be able to finish her report over dinner, most likely.

"Ready to go?"

She fought down her urge to jump, feeling his breath on the hairs covering the back of her neck. When the hell had he gotten so close? She turned, "Just about, sir."

"Ah." His eyes were watching her. "Good."

Sam swallowed and finished zipping her laptop case. "Good to go."

He left first, and Sam found her eyes drawn to his backside. dammit. This was pathetic. She moved to follow him, suddenly feeling tired again. Maybe this was a side effect of using the hand device. Increased attraction to Jack O'Neill. There should be warning labels, she decided in irritation.

Of course, last time, there hadn't been any sort of effect like this. Her dad had been there, though.

"Carter?"

She looked at him as she got into the elevator.

"What's the matter?"

"Nothing, sir."

He looked unconvinced, but let it drop.

Which was nice of him. And kind of sexy. She closed her eyes and resisted banging her head against the side of the elevator. Maybe she should have asked Daniel to give her a ride home.

There were several moments of awkward silence, and then-

"Have I mentioned how proud I am of you, Carter?"

"...sir?" Her head shot up and she stared at him.

"I'm proud." He flushed a bit, smiling. "Of you and what you did on that mission. There aren't many officers who could get their entire team home alive and relatively unharmed against those odds."

"I, uh, had a good team, sir." She couldn't fight off the blush that stained her cheeks.

"And they had a good commander." He patted her shoulder. "You and I both know that a bad commander can destroy even a good team."

"I was trained by the best," she replied, fighting off the sudden urge to burst into tears and kiss him right there. Dignified, Carter! Newly-heroic colonels are supposed to be completely dignified, she reminded herself.

This was ridiculous, she told herself firmly as the elevator reached ground level and they stepped off. She was just tired. Or maybe... The thought occured again that the hand device might be at fault. It did require emotions to use. And she'd definitely stirred the pot a little. So to speak.

"Carter?"

"Yes, sir?"

He finished signing out, then handed the clipboard over. "You all right?"

"Just tired, sir."

"Well, when _was_ the last time you slept?"

"Er," she looked at her watch. "A long time ago."

"Thought so." He bundled her into the passenger seat of his truck, then went around and climbed in his side. "So, when was the last time you ate?"

"Lunch with the new SG-1." She couldn't stop the smile that climbed across her lips.

"Captain Jones was that good, huh?" He grinned.

"I really think he'll be a valuable addition to the team," she replied. "He takes orders well, he's bright, he puts up with Daniel's lectures..."

Jack laughed, a sound that Sam realized she liked hearing out of him. "He's a brave man, then." He fastened his seatbelt and started the truck. "You want to go grab a bite to eat?"

"Well-"

"I'll pay," he said, coaxingly.

Sam considered for a moment, her previous reactions, the way her blood was still slightly heated. And decided it was safe. She wasn't going to jump him the second she might possibly have a chance to. Just because soon she might be able to climb into his bed, make him beg, and cuddle all night didn't mean she was any less in control. "All right."

He drove to a small roadside diner, "This okay?"

Blinking at the way her stomach suddenly announced that it was more than okay, she smiled. "Yes."

"Good." He got out and came around to help her down, keeping his hand under her elbow as the walked to the door. For a moment, they argued silently over who got to hold the door open, then Jack acquiesced with a roll of his eyes.

So she swatted his ass.

"Carter!"

"It was there."

He was clearly trying not to smile. "Oh, just you wait, Carter... remember, I know where you live."

"In my lab?"

"We really need to work on that," he mused. They stopped at a table, Jack gallantly holding out her chair for her. Sam rolled her eyes and sat and felt her skin tingle as his hand "accidentally" brushed over the bare skin on the back of her neck. He slid into his seat and picked up a menu, looking completely unruffled.

Sam picked up the other menu and looked it over, fighting the urge to rub the back of her neck. "So, um, you have any recommendations?"

"The chicken's good, the steak... Potatoes..." Jack shrugged, "It's all pretty decent, except for the fish."

Fighting down the smile that threatened, Sam carefully looked back at the menu, "You don't like fish?"

"I like fishing."

"Mhmm." She peeked at him, and smirked, "So, all those fishing invites. To get me to a lake that has no fish, so you could... sit and do what, General?"

His own lips were slipping into a smirk, "Gosh, Carter, I have no idea what you're implying."

"Right. And I always take my downtime."

"I'll hold you to that."

Their waitress arrived, rubbing a hand through her dark hair, "Would you like to start with something to drink?"

Sam took advantage of his distraction to rub the back of her neck. It didn't help, she could still feel the phantom tingle. This was absurd. "I'd like a diet soda, please."

"Same thing," Jack said. "But I want mine with the calories in." His eyes twinkled at Sam.

"Sure thing. I'll be back in just a moment." The waitress gave them both a friendly, slightly tired smile and walked back to the kitchen.

"So..." Sam tried to think of something else to talk about. "Um, did you get in touch with the Kelownans?"

Jack sighed. "Yes. And they gave me the usual rigmarole about how they couldn't possibly part with Jonas Quinn and his unique talents because Earth couldn't possibly need him as much as they did. I'm surprised they haven't driven him to defect again."

"Hair gel."

"What?"

"Hair gel," she toyed with the corner of her menu, then smirked, "Jonas liked having the ability to slick his hair up in spikes-remember? You used to call him the cactus?"

"Oh. Right." He blinked. "So, if I offered him hair gel, he'd defect again?"

"Why not? It's not like he's doing anything there that's so desperate. If they can't behave like adults without someone there to mother them, maybe they should think twice about having such a vast amount of government."

"Carter, when did you become such a smartass?"

"I have no idea what you mean, sir."

Jack shook his head, smiling. "Hair gel... "

"Yep." She grinned and smiled as the waitress came back and put their drinks down. "Oh, thank you."

"No problem, ma'am. You guys ready to order?"

Sam took a last glance at the menu. "I think I just want a grilled chicken sandwich and a salad."

The waitress wrote it down and nodded, turning to Jack. "And you, sir?"

"I'll have the barbecue steak sandwich and a baked potato."

"All right," She collected their menus, "I'll just get those started."

"So..." Sam twirled her strawpaper after she'd left and watched it as it crinkled and uncrinkled.

"What?"

"You're not retiring."

"Neither are you."

She glanced up and met his eyes, "And if the rest of SG-1 decide not to take this posting?"

"Then the SGC will be getting a new civillian administrator."

"Ah."

Acting on a sudden impulse, Jack reached out and caught her hand in his. "Sam... " She blinked at his unexpected use of her first name. "Look, we'll make this work. I'm not sure quite how yet, but I'm stubborn." His lips twitched into a faint grin.

"Oh, I knew that," she replied with a smile, trying to keep her tone light and making no attempt to release her hand from his.

He squeezed her hand gently, smirking. "Hey, you knew what you were getting into from the start, Carter."

"Is it too late to run for the hills?" Laughter filled her eyes.

"Yep." His smirk widened. "I don't plan on letting go of you anytime soon."

"Good." The next words almost made her blush, but she figured she was too damned old for that, "Because I don't either."

Damn. Now they both had really silly smirks on their faces.

"Refill?"

Thankful for the waitress, Sam looked up at her, "Yes, please."

"Little General's room," the General announced, standing. He disappeared towards one side of the dining room.

Sam shook her head, chuckling softly.

"He's a good one, you know," the waitress paused in her pouring and nodded towards the empty side of the table. "Nice guy, definitely a keeper."

"Yes," Sam agreed. "He is."

"You make him happy."

Before she could manage an answer to that observation, the waitress was gone again. Sam automatically took a sip of her soda to cover her surprise.

A small grin crossed her face and she sighed. He made her pretty happy too, Sam decided.


	9. In Which Sap Occurs

**The Continuing Misadventures of SG-1 or 101 Things A Girl Can Do.**  
by ALC Punk! and Ryuu  
_Chapter Nine: In Which Sap Occurs_

"Mind if I walk you to your door?" Jack asked with a grin as he pulled his truck into her driveway.

She raised an eyebrow. "And when did you become such a gentleman?"

"I have many hidden talents," he replied, deadpan.

"I bet you do," she said without thinking. Then flushed. "That so, I did not, I mean..." She trailed off, floundering in the face of the smirk on his lips.

He climbed out and came around to help her down again. "Ya know, Carter, if I didn't know better, I'd say you shouldn't sleep alone tonight."

"What?"

"Well, from the way you keep fading in and out and acting so... cutely confused, maybe you've got a concussion or something. And need to be awakened every hour."

She narrowed her eyes at him as she took her keys out. "Sir... What are you talking about?"

He shoved his hands in his pockets and looked at her.

The moment held for several seconds, then she looked down at her hands, noting idly that they were shaking as she put the key in the lock. "You're still-I mean... don'tgo." The last was blurted out before she could consciously realize what she was going to say.

"I should."

"Dammit." She dropped her keys and turned to him, grabbing his shirt and dragging him close. "You're not going without -"

His lips cut her off.

Sam startled for a brief moment before relaxing into the kiss. This was... good, part of her brain hazily reflected. Better than kissing Pete. Not that Pete couldn't hold his own at kissing. In fact, he'd been fairly talented at it, but this felt...right. Solid in a way that she'd never had with Pete.

Jack's hand came up to cradle the side of her face as he increased the pressure of his kiss, and she was suddenly incapable of any more coherent thought. She slid her hands around the back of his neck, wondering how she'd never realized that he was _this_ good at kissing.

They released each other slowly, Jack's hand lingering against her cheek and his eyes regarding her tenderly.

"Sam."

"I love you," she blurted out, almost unconsciously.

His eyes widened briefly before he smiled again, his eyes still tender.

"I thought we'd figured that out a long time ago," he answered softly.

* * *

"So, Sam."

Looking up from her computer, she smiled. "Daniel."

The archeologist shot her a glance, "Last night, you went home with Jack."

"He drove me home, Daniel. There's a difference."

"Uh-huh. And that's why he drove you in this morning, too."

"Yes." He'd been rather irritatingly cute, too. All grumpy and cranky as he helped her into the truck.

Of course, being late had been his fault.

"And he went home after that."

"Yes." Eventually. At something like five, when she'd poked his side and made him leave her, drowsy and sated because it would look bad for the General to always wear the same clothing.

"Oh. So, you..."

She shot him a glare. "Daniel."

"Right." He bounced on his toes, then grinned, "So, are we taking the appointment to the Alpha Site?"

"That's up to you guys, isn't it?" she asked serenely.

"But Sam, it's because-" Daniel paused, then finished with, "It's your choice too."

"It's asking a lot, though. You three are a great team and I want to be know that you're all sure of what you want before we make a final decision." She smiled. "Don't worry about me, Daniel. Make your own choice."

"Look, Sam... just do what makes you happy." He leaned in and gave her a quick, brotherly kiss on the forehead. "God knows, you've earned it."

"Thank you," Sam replied, touched.

"Colonel Carter, Daniel Jackson," intoned Teal'c as he walked into the lab, "It is good to see you."

"Hey, Teal'c."

Five seconds later, Captain Jones arrived, breathless, "Am I late?"

"Uh, no." Sam glanced at Daniel and Teal'c. "I wasn't aware we were planning a meeting, guys."

"Well, Sam," Daniel shrugged, "We figured now would be a good time to talk about SG-1. And since you have this, big, empty lab..."

She chuckled, "Ah." Closing her laptop, she looked at them. "So. Thoughts?"

"Well," began Daniel, "It sounds like a fun opportunity. Of course, I'll miss my office. And there won't be coffee that isn't Starbucks. But, I figure, if anyone can make something like this idea work, it ought to be us, SG-1."

"Mhmm. Teal'c?"

"There may be greater opportunities to contact and promote the rebel jaffa at the remote base." The ex-first prime of Apophis half-smiled, "And the change of scenery will be invigorating."

"Right." She eyed him a moment, then glanced at Jones. "Captain?"

"Well, sir," He looked uncomfortable, "I'm not sure I'd like being off-world all the time, but, I figure it's like being stationed somewhere. I won't be able to call my family, but that's okay, 'cause they'll be safe."

"You have no wife, girlfriend?"

"No, ma'am."

She sighed, "So we're all connection-less people who pretty much live on-base anyway."

"Right, Sam, now, let's go tell Jack."

"Wait a minute," Sam blinked, "All three of you are voting we go?"

They nodded.

"And when did you decide this?"

Daniel smirked, "I'll tell you later. For now, just get used to the fact that we're going."

She looked at them for a long moment, her expression both overwhelmed and grateful. "I... we'll let the General know," she said at last. "I think he's, er, free now."

"And I'm sure we can arrange some sort of regular schedule of leave," Daniel said, reassuringly. "We've all got stuff about Colorado Springs we'll miss."

Sam glanced at him, but saw only a carefully bland expression on his face. "Like coffee shops, Daniel?"

"Yeah... coffee shops."

"It'll be nice to see Mat'rik again," Theo piped up. "I think he planned to stay on there, sir."

"Speaking of people it would be nice to see again," Daniel looked at Sam, "You want Jonas Quinn to join SG-1?"

"Well, at the time, Daniel, I was making a point to the General, about SG-1 being a four-man team." She glanced at Jones apologetically, "It was before you'd been assigned, Captain. And I told him I wanted Jonas."

"And we are getting Jonas Quinn, are we not?" Teal'c sounded happy. Almost.

"If J-the General can get them to agree, yes. Even now, it would be good to have him on board."

"Jonas knows my research almost as well as I do," Daniel said carefully. "It would be... useful to have him with us."

"Daniel-"

"It's a good idea," he interrupted. "We met under awkward circumstances," a lopsided grin crossed his face, "but it'd work for the best in the long run."

"So... does this mean I'm being assigned to another team, sir?" Jones asked, obviously hiding his disappointment.

Sam smiled at him. "It means SG-1 becomes a five-person team, Captain. You're a good officer and I want you to stay with us."

"Yeah." Daniel looked innocent. "You wouldn't want the General to have to stop doing all that nice paperwork to transfer you, right?"

"No." The Captain agreed, grinning.

"So, this impromptu team meeting is now over, then," Sam said dryly. "And I have work to do."

"Uh, Sam, didn't Brightman tell you to take the next few days off?"

"Just a little paperwork, Daniel."

"I believe I shall inform Dr. Brightman that you are here, Colonel Carter."

Sam gaped at the jaffa, "Teal'c! You, you-Benedict!"

"Oh, c'mon, Sam. Your paperwork will wait. You should go home. Rest." Daniel waved his hand. "I'll go give Jack the good news."

"Fine." Glowering at her over-protective team, Sam flipped her laptop closed. "But only on one condition."

"Oh?"

"The three of you rest, too."

"But I wanted to catalogue the photographs I took of those ruins and compare them with-"

Sam raised an eyebrow. "A deal's a deal, Daniel. Your photographs will wait too."

"Oh, all right," Daniel acquiesced with a frown.

"Are they usually like this?" Theo whispered to Teal'c.

"Quite frequently," Teal'c replied solemnly.

"Ah." Inspecting them, he shrugged, "It can't be that bad, can it?"

"It can indeed," a smile flittered across Teal'c's lips, "However, it is merely a sign of their care for each other."

"So, that's a good thing. Right." Running a hand through his short hair, Theo briefly considered, "It would be worse if they didn't."

Teal'c inclined his head, "You are correct." He raised his voice, "Colonel Carter, Daniel Jackson, would it not be prudent to leave now?"

"Oh, right." Daniel smirked, "Bye, Sam. Don't come back until the day after tomorrow."

"You, either, Daniel." She narrowed her eyes. "Maybe I'll make sure the General tells the guards on the gate to only let you in during an emergency."

"I thought I was talking to Jack, Sam?"

"You are."

He smirked. "And when were you planning to?"

"I-wasn't." She grabbed her case and headed for the door, "See you guys later."

A chorus of goodbyes followed her. Daniel continued to smirk.

* * *

Jack's hand rested against her chest as he held her back cradled against him. His breath was warm against her neck. Occasionally he'd murmur something sweet and cuddle her closer. Sam sighed and slid her hand over Jack's, lacing her fingers with his.

"Daniel knows," she whispered.

She felt his chuckle rumble through his chest. "I'm not surprised. Our Dr. Jackson's a pretty smart man." He kissed the nape of her neck. "Is that why he decided to take the posting?"

"I don't know." Sam ran her other hand over his bicep in quick caress. "He told me to choose what made me happy."

"Did you?"

Sam smiled and turned in his arms, facing him. "What do you think?"

"I think that if I'm going to only see you every three weeks we need to have a lot of sex. Now."

She snorted and smacked his arm. "Ass."

"Yup." The smirk on his lips was unrepentant. "I also think that if I think about it too much, it will all become an alternate reality. So I prefer not thinking."

"Right." Sam tilted her head. "So, shall we continue with the not thinking, or are you content with just staring?"

A smirk touched his lips. "You have to ask?"

"Oh, right." She rolled her eyes while fingering the sleeve of his t-shirt. "I forgot. Did anyone ever tell you you've got a one-track mind, Jack?"

"Yup." He leaned forward and kissed her gently. "'s my middle name."

She snorted, but kissed him back, then sighed and pulled back to look at him. "You were going home, remember? You have a house, and things to do?"

"They can wait?" He suggested helpfully, slipping a hand under the t-shirt she'd dragged on earlier without bothering to get a bra.

She'd figured that was kind of silly since she was just going to cuddle on the sofa with Jack. Not that she'd wanted to get dressed. But while the idea of sleeping with him naked against her was a nice one, there were realities to consider. Like the fact that he was still technically her commanding officer. Funny, how she'd stopped considering that about the first time he got her shirt over her head.

"Jaaaack..." she tried to keep her voice stern. Tough to do, considering that his hands were-she yelped softly. "Jack!"

He laughed and withdrew his hands, wrapping his arms back around her. "Do you really want me to go home now?"

"That's not a fair question," she replied, snuggling against him. "Of course I don't. But you should, even if I don't want you to."

He looked at her soulfully. "Mind if we keep doing this just a little while longer?"

"Just a little longer," she conceded.

"Mmm..." One of his hands slid up to briefly tease her hair. "Sam?"

"Hmm?"

"I love you too."

She smiled. "Glad to hear it."

"Although, I can't feel my legs anymore."

She snorted. "Uh-huh. Is this going to be the start of many excuses why you can't leave?"

"No." He kissed her cheek.

"Fine." She poked him. "Get up, then."

"Y're sitting on me, Carter, that's kind of hard."

"Caught me." She leaned over and kissed the tip of his nose, then scrambled up and held out a hand. "C'mon, General, I'll walk you to the door."

He lunged, catching her tight against him and buried his lips in her neck. "Ya sure about that?"

Sam squirmed, suddenly very aware of certain things. "Yes. You have to -" she squeaked as he nipped her earlobe, "-go!"

A sigh. "Okay, okay." He released her and headed towards the door. "But, tomorrow?"

"Yes," she said, "Tomorrow."

"Good."

She stood and watched as he walked to his truck and climbed in, then closed the door and leaned against it, a slight smile on her lips. Damn. She was getting sappy in her old age.


	10. Where Plans Are Made And More Sap Occurs

**The Continuing Misadventures of SG-1 or 101 Things A Girl Can Do.**  
by ALC Punk! and Ryuu  
_Chapter Ten: Where Plans Are Made And More Sap Occurs_

Every SG team leader was crammed into the briefing room. Half of them stood, leaning against the walls or the window that let into the gateroom. Jack approached them, several files in his hands, Walter trailing behind him carrying a mug of coffee. "I'm sure you're all wondering why I called you here today."

Only Lieutenant Colonel Carter smiled, although a few of them snorted.

Jack settled into his chair. "I was having a conversation with the President and Major Davis the other day. And they agreed to implement an idea I've been considering for a while." He flipped open a folder and pulled out a stack of paper. "Here, everyone take one of these. As of this week, there are to be three SG teams stationed at the Alpha Site. Think of it as being stationed overseas. You'll provide support for the Alpha Site as well as running normal SG missions. Exploring strange new worlds and all that crap."

During the pause, the papers were passed to the men and women standing, and Jack sipped his coffee. "The rotational schedules are tentative, for the moment. As we all know, no one can say that every SG team will be healthy in six months let alone three weeks."

"Sir?" Colonel Reynolds glanced at the other team leaders, "Is this a wise decision?"

"I think so, Colonel. After all, you never know when Earth will explode like the Death Star." He took another sip of his coffee, "It's probably best to have as many people off world as possible. By the end of the year, if this goes well, the ante will be upped to six SG teams."

"Three weeks on, one week off," Lieutenant Colonel Serena Carrington snorted, "What happens if there are injuries?"

"Like I said, it's flexible." Jack looked around at them. "You all know how dangerous this job is. To the best of your knowledge, is this an unworkable plan?"

There was a slow chorus of "No's" around the table. Jack nodded. "Thought so. Now, with the help of General Hammond and Major Davis, I've picked three teams to go. SG-1, SG-15, and SG-17." He met the eyes of the three team leaders. "I've previously discussed this with them, and they are apparently ready to go. Your first tour of duty, people, is five months."

"And just when do we go, sir?" the leader of SG-15, Colonel Joseph Lambert asked. He grinned. "I think my team's trying to get as much Earth-side party time in as possible, to be frank."

A chuckle drifted through the room.

Lieutenant Colonel Teryl Riker, leader of SG-17 nodded and caught Sam's eye, giving her a surreptitious wink. Sam bit back a grin. The dark-haired Colonel was one of the few female team leaders at the SGC and rumored to possess a fairly wicked sense of humor, although Sam didn't know her well yet. Base gossip had her down as one of Colonel Carter's staunchest defenders after her promotion. Sam was looking forward to getting to know her better at the Alpha Site.

"You're all scheduled to leave in two weeks," the General answered with a grin, "Which should also give Dr. Jackson time to stock up on coffee before his departure."

Another laugh echoed around the table.

"Any more questions?" Jack took another look around the table and nodded. "Good luck to our departing teams, then. If there are any questions or suggestions about this project, please feel free to come by my office. Dismissed!"

Teryl caught Sam's shoulder as they filed out of the briefing room. "Colonel Carter?" She smiled. "I thought I should at least say hi to you before we go off-world together." Her grey eyes were filled with warmth and good humor. "I've been looking forward to a chance to work with you, actually."

"Me, Colonel Riker?" Sam asked, surprised.

"It's Teryl." Her smile widened. "And you and SG-1 are well on the way to becoming legendary! Of course I have."

"Well, thank you. That's very flattering, but I have to say it wouldn't happen if my team weren't damn good at their jobs." A chuckle escaped her, "And General O'Neill certainly had a hand in it."

Teryl shook her head, "I've been reading old mission reports, Colonel, and you sell yourself short if you don't count yourself, too."

"It's Sam, Teryl. And thank you." Wishing to change the subject to something less embarrassing, Sam cast around and blurted, "What made you join the SGC?"

"That's a long story Col-Sam." Teryl grinned, "Best told over lots and lots of vodka."

Sam laughed. "Sounds about right for this place."

"Yeah. So, what made you join?"

Sam reached out and swiped her pass through the elevator's slot, "Well, I wanted to join NASA... You're right. This should require vodka, otherwise it'll be boring."

"Ack." Teryl suddenly looked at her watch, "I hate to greet you and run, but I promised Lieutenant Carver I'd spar with him after the team leader meeting."

"We'll talk later. It was nice meeting you."

They shook, and Teryl grinned again, "You, too, Sam."

"Kick Carver's ass!" Sam called after her.

"Plan to!"

Sam was still chuckling as she stepped onto the elevator and chose her floor.

* * *

"Hold the elevator, please!" A familiar voice called out. Daniel managed to launch himself through before the doors closed and looked at Sam, panting a bit. "Hey."

"Hey." She grinned. "Where are you headed?"

"My office, please."

Sam punched the button. "You want to go for coffee tonight?"

"My last Earth side coffee for three weeks?" Daniel gave an exaggerated shudder. "Yes, please."

Sam laughed. "You ever think it might be time for you to cut down?"

"Cut down on coffee? Are you nuts?" He grinned. "So... seen Jack lately?"

"I was just in a meeting with him," she replied evenly.

"Is that what the kids are calling it these days?"

She shook her head. "Daniel..."

"Oh, come on, Sam." He eyed her, then grinned, "So, go anywhere special during your two weeks off? Like, say, fishing, perhaps?"

As if he didn't know. Sam rolled her eyes. "I don't like fishing."

"Ah. He didn't ask? I'm disturbed, and saddened, Sam. I thought Jack would've found this the perfect opportunity to take you fishing."

"Daniel."

He glanced at her, "Fine, fine. I'll be good." Under his breath, he muttered, "For now."

"So, what did you do for your two weeks?"

"Made extensive notes on things, discussed the backlog with the rest of the lingual department."

"Drank coffee?" She teased as they exited on the same level.

"You have to ask?" Daniel made a face. "If I can even get drinkable coffee there..."

Sam laughed and beckoned him into her office. "Follow me, Dr. Jackson. I have something for you."

"Oooo... I get presents now?" He grinned and caught the paper bag she tossed at him. "Can I open it?"

"Yes." She rolled her eyes. "Drama queen."

Daniel let out a pleased sigh as he found a large package of Italian Roast and a smaller one of chocolate covered espresso beans. "Sam... I think I love you."

"Of course you do." She smirked. "Don't drink that all at once, now."

"Yes, mom."

"Daniel."

He grinned and headed for the door, "I have better things to do than bait you, Colonel-Doctor."

"And don't you forget it." She chuckled as he disappeared, and looked at her desk. And sighed. Time to make sure she had everything she might possibly need packed.

The phone rang, distracting her. "Carter."

"Colonel, this is Walter, General O'Neill requests your presence in his office, ma'am."

"Now?"

"Yes."

"All right, I'll be there." She hung up and considered. Obviously, this wasn't an emergency. But he could have said something this morning before leaving for his own house. Bah. She was being silly. Besides, maybe he'd heard from Langara. The Kelownans had to give her Jonas, dammit.

Or maybe he wanted some clandestine kissing on base. They'd made vague rules, like, "No sex when there's a crisis unless it's necessary." Plus, they both figured they'd been good for eight years, having to abstain again couldn't be that hard. Could it?

Remembering the rather pleasant way he'd awakened her to say goodbye, she shifted in the elevator.

Maybe thinking about the General and sex wasn't such a good idea. She rearranged her thoughts, mentally ticking off everything she needed to take with her to the Alpha Site.

Sadly, Jack's ass wasn't on it.

Knocking on his door, Sam resisted the urge to peer around the edge and see what the heck he was doing.

"Come in, Carter."

She slipped in and closed the door behind her. "Sir?"

He grinned and waved to a chair. "Have a seat. You ready to go tomorrow?"

Sam sat and smiled at him. "I think so, sir. Just getting Daniel caffeinated."

Jack shuddered. "That man and his coffee...did you know he tried to talk me into requisitioning an espresso maker for the Alpha Site? I'm amazed he still decided to go after I turned him down."

Sam chuckled. "He really believes in you, I guess." She leaned forward, trying to keep the eagerness from her voice. "So, what did you need to talk to me about, sir? Have the Kelownans contacted you?"

Jack sighed, and Sam suddenly felt disappointment settle into the pit of her stomach. "Carter, I-"

"They said no."

He nodded. "I'm sorry, Carter. I tried. But they insisted that Jonas was too important to the diplomatic process for them to let him go."

She tried not to curse. "I know you tried, sir. And thank you." She forced a smile. "At least SG-1 is a four-man team again."

"Carter-"

Sam stood, trying to show that she didn't need consoling over this. "I'll just go see if my team is finished packing-"

"Carter." His tone was firm.

She stopped and looked back up at him. "Sir?"

"I said they insisted. I didn't say Jonas agreed."

"What are you saying, sir?"

Jack began smirking, like the cat that ate the canary. Sam checked his desk for feathers. "I've got an early birthday present for you, Carter."

"Hey, Sam."

She blinked and turned to find the smiling Kelownan standing behind her. "Jonas!"

"In the flesh." He was smiling.

She moved and hugged him. "But, I thought -"

"Well, once I'd heard that SG-1 needed me, I realized something."

"Oh?" She stepped back, smiling.

"Langara has no hair gel."

The General snorted. "What he's neglecting to say is that he told them to screw themselves and came through the gate on his own cognizance."

"So... you ran away?"

"Kind of. Basically, I wanted to come. They wouldn't let me go, so I came anyway."

"That's great." Sam smiled, "Look, why don't you go find Daniel or Teal'c. They'll get you packed up and ready to go. Ok?"

"Sam?"

"Yes?"

"It's great to be back."

"Good." She waited until he'd gone, then carefully closed the door to the corridor. "So, General, was that all you wanted?" The door to the briefing room was already closed, and the blinds came down easily.

"Er, yes?"

"Ah." She moved around his desk and leaned against it, facing him. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

She bent sideways, and kissed him.

He squawked against her mouth, then apparently stopped thinking.

"I thought this wasn't allowed," he managed a few minutes later when she pulled back. Although that was relative, since she was now straddling his lap.

"Special circumstances." She smirked and kissed his nose.

"Yeah?" He grinned, his hands wrapping around her waist. "These circumstances happen often?"

"Well, when I want to thank you for doing such a good job..." Sam smiled and went back to kissing him.

He ventured a quick grope. "So... that's a 'no', then?"

Sam laughed softly, then sobered. "I'm going to miss you."

"Me too." He managed a smile and pulled her closer. "But it's only three weeks. We'll handle it."

"Yeah." She let her head rest against his shoulder for a moment, then kissed his neck.

He let out a deep breath, shifting in his seat lightly. "Carter... I think we need to stop now," he said, reluctantly. "Or move to a more appropriate location."

Sam grinned and gave him another firm kiss. "You coming over tonight?"

"Wild horses, Carter."

She raised an eyebrow. "Kinky..."

He coughed. "Colonel, I suggest you remove yourself from my lap. Walter's probably about to come tell me I've missed an appointment." His hand stole another swift grope.

"Darn." She kissed him one last time, then stood, smirking slightly. "Might want to stay sitting for a while, General. Think about taxes, Paul Davis, Anubis naked on a cold day."

"Carter." He growled.

"Sir?"

"You're evil."

"Of course, sir." She smirked and opened the door to find Walter on the other side. "The General will see you now."

"Uh, thank you, ma'am." Walter looked vaguely disturbed.

"What's up, Walter?" Jack determinedly did not watch Sam Carter's retreating ass.

"Anubis naked on a cold day, sir?"

"Colonel Carter was being silly."

"Yes, sir." Walter set down a stack of paper. "These are all requisitions for the equipment being moved to the Alpha Site tomorrow, sir. If you could just make sure they're all correct and sign them, we'll begin loading the skids."

"Right." Jack stayed in his seat and reached for the forms. "I'll take care of this, then."

"Sir?"

Jack managed a jovial smile. "Why don't you take five, Walter? Get yourself a cup of coffee or something? You've earned a break with all the work you've been putting into this project."

"Um... thank you, sir." Walter nodded confusedly. "Are you sure you don't need anything else?"

"I'll be fine." Jack gave his assistant a thumbs-up.

"Right, sir." Walter shot him one last disturbed look, then left, muttering "Anubis naked..." under his breath.

Jack made a face, then shifted in his chair. Damn her. Not that it was completely her fault, but still... "Once you've had Carter you never go back." He muttered, then turned to the stack of requisitions with a sigh. If this didn't help, he'd have to invite her to lunch. In the storage closet on level 19.


	11. Where Jack Makes Out and Sam Is Given Go...

The Continuing Misadventures of SG-1 or 101 Things A Girl Can Do.  
by ALC Punk! and Ryuu  
Chapter Eleven: Where Jack Makes Out and Sam Is Given Good Advice 

"Ahhh..." Jonas put down his latte with a pleased sigh. "Hair gel's not the only thing about Earth I missed."

Sam looked over at Daniel. "He missed coffee and hair gel more than us. I'm hurt."

Daniel looked at his Americano mournfully. "I'm gonna miss real coffee. Jonas has his priorities straight, Sam."

She made a face. "You guys are incorrible."

"I prefer to think we're endearing," Daniel replied with dignity.

She snorted and took a sip of her hot cocoa. It was strange to think of the changes that had occurred so quickly. Pete saying goodbye, putting her foot down at the General for his over-protectiveness, Captain Jones, and now Jonas. "The nurses certainly think you are."

"Hey," Jonas perked up even more (if that were possible), "Is Lieutenant Rush still around?"

"Yes," smirking, Sam took another sip, then dipped her biscotti in and swirled it around. "And she's a Captain, now."

"Cool."

"Wait... Rush," Daniel frowned, "That's the, the one with the -"

"Huge tracts of land?" supplied Sam with a smirk.

"Right."

Daniel, at least, had the grace to blush. Jonas just continued smiling.

Shaking her head, Sam took a bite of her now-soaked biscotti.

"Anyway, Sam, I think being at the Alpha Site is going to be exciting."

Daniel looked at Jonas, then looked at Sam, "Was I ever this bouncy?"

"You were worse."

"Oh."

"Come on, Dr. Jackson, don't you find it exciting?"

"Yeah, maybe. And please, Mr. Quinn, call me Daniel."

The Kelownan nodded, "Only if you call me Jonas, like Sam and the General do."

"Fine. Jonas." Daniel made a face. "I really can't believe I was as bouncy as you."

"Not bouncy. You were very... earnest."

"And, wait." Eyeing her, Daniel turned to Jonas, "She's forgetting how eager she was. I remember her practically giddy with excitement when I showed her the cartouche. She couldn't shut up about it."

"Well, it was exciting!"

"See?" Jonas looked at them both, smug. "You_do_ find things exciting."

"Fine, fine, point conceded." Daniel made a face, "I just... I've died a lot. Shouldn't I be jaded?"

Sam rolled her eyes, "Yes, of course you should, Daniel."

He stuck his tongue out at her. "C'mon, Sam, you know what I mean."

"No, actually, I don't. There is wonder in the universe, Daniel. Even after you've been tortured and injured and killed and revived too many times to count, you can't just give that up."

"Especially not when you're having sex with Jack."

She glared at him. "And just what makes you think that?"

Daniel looked innocent. "Oh, I don't know... you're glowing and actually taking time off when it's offered, he's glowing and cracking more bad jokes than usual, the unresolved sexual tension at the SGC has gone down tenfold..."

"Anyone ever tell you you're evil, Dr. Jackson?" she muttered, scowling down at her cup.

"All the time," he remarked cheerfully. "C'mon, Sam... you know I've been cheering you guys on since day one." He smirked. "Course, it might've helped if you'd wound up at Jack's place once in a while. Y'know... so someone would be there when I called?"

Jonas beamed at her. "You and the General?"

Sam flushed and nodded, ducking her head. Jonas' smile became even brighter.

"Congratulations! It's taken long enough!"

"Got that right," Daniel said pleasantly.

Sam tried not to smile. "Fine, Jack and I have been... discussing a few matters pertaining to our relationship. But, at the moment, we really can't be public about it."

"But when we leave..." Daniel's eyes twinkled wickedly.

She couldn't stop the grin that crossed her face. "Yeah."

* * *

"We really have to stop meeting like this."

The General wasn't listening, his hands sliding under her BDU top, his lips trailing down her neck.

Sam let out a hiss and arched into his touch. "Really. People might start talking."

The storage closet on level 19 was a smallish room. Just large enough for buckets and mops, and the General and the Colonel. Sam wasn't sure who had started using it as a place for this sort of thing, but she was glad she'd never used it before now.

"Carter," he announced, the tone irritated, and slightly muffled, "Shut up."

"Shutting up, sir." With her hand in his hair, she turned her head and pulled his mouth to hers. The kiss was hard containing everything and nothing and she wanted the world to stop so she wouldn't have to.

He explored under her shirt, his fingertips gliding smoothly over her skin. "So damn hot..." he muttered.

Sam groaned softly and pressed against him. "Thanks..." A thought occurred to her. "How much longer do we have?"

"Not long enough," he replied with a groan of his own.

"Jaaaaaaack..."

He stopped kissing her and pulled back. "You're right."

"I am?"

"We've got to stop meeting like this."

"Yeah." Pulling back further, she sighed. "I should go make sure the skids are all in the gateroom."

His fingers slid across her ribs one last time, then he released her. "You're not going to be able to walk for two days when you get back."

"I'm not?" Her eyes dared him.

His mouth closed on the side of her neck, and he bit down lightly. "I think I'll tie you to my bed."

"Sounds like a plan, General."

"That's why I got the stars on my uniform," he replied smugly. His lips pressed soothingly against the place he'd just bitten before he drew his head back.

"You sure it wasn't for all those times we saved the world?" She grinned.

"Well, maybe a bit," he conceded.

"Maybe more than a bit." She paused for a moment, then suddenly threw her arms back around him. A startled Jack happily returned the hug.

"Thought you had things to do, Carter?"

She buried her head against his shoulder. "I'll be back."

He sighed and ran his hands along her back comfortingly. "Of course you will."

"I should go before Daniel comes looking for me."

"Yeah." He kissed her again. "Might give him a shock."

"Actually..."

"What?"

Sam reluctantly let him go, then stepped away and smoothed down her shirt. "He knows." Opening the door, she glanced at him, "Apparently, all of SG-1 do."

"Huh." He followed her out of the closet, intent on escorting her to the gateroom. "They do?"

"Daniel said something about you never being home."

A smirk tipped up one side of Jack's mouth. "He'd be right, Carter."

She grinned back. "You probably shouldn't encourage him, sir. He's enjoying this far too much already."

Jack looked very, very pleased with himself. "So am I, Colonel."

She raised an eyebrow and smirked, making Jack suddenly very, very sorry they'd already left the closet. "Y'know, he's right... you _are_ glowing these days."

"Ya telling me I'm about to start craving pickles and ice cream, Carter?"

"God." She stopped dead in the middle of the hall and stared at him. "You. Pregnant. What a frightening concept, sir."

"I think my kids would be cute."

She raised an eyebrow at him, then continued to the elevator and swiped her card through. "Wow. It'll be three weeks before I do that again..."

"Yeah." He stepped in and nudged her with his shoulder. "I made sure they put extra blue jello on the skids for you."

"Gosh, sir. You're so thoughtful." But she was smiling.

"There's also something called mango-riffic kool-aid, and ten pounds of macadamia nuts." He made a face. "I'm keeping all my team leaders happy, this way."

Sam chuckled. "Relatively speaking, anyway."

Hidden by their bodies, Jack reached down and slid his hand through hers, gripping her fingers firmly. "Well, there's only so much I can do, Carter."

"And some things that just can't go on those skids," she agreed and squeezed back. "Still, we all knew this was going to be a bit hard, didn't we, sir?"

He smiled and nodded. "We certainly did, Carter."

"Besides. I might get bored if I have you around all the time, and start kicking you out of bed."

He didn't get to answer her with more than a squawk, as the elevator doors opened on the level and she stepped out, pulling her hand smoothly out of his and nodding to a nearby airman.

It felt strangely official to walk her to the gateroom.

Right outside the door, he reached out and touched her shoulder. "You will come back."

"Yes, sir." She half-turned and saluted him.

"Hey, Sam!" Daniel came bouncing up, Jonas, Teal'c and Theo trailing behind him. "You all ready?"

"Ugh." She eyed them. "You all look very... bouncy today."

"Well, we are going to the Alpha Site, Sam," Daniel smirked, "It's a little exciting."

"Indeed." Teal'c inclined his head, a hint of a smile on his lips.

Theo grinned. "We're all packed up, sir. Adding Mr. Quinn's-"

"Jonas," he interrupted.

"...Jonas' supplies wasn't a problem at all."

"Didn't think it would be, Captain." Sam smiled. "Thanks."

Jack watched Sam interact with her team, feeling just a bit left out.

Which was strange, because he never thought he'd feel left out of SG-1. But then, he'd never thought he'd make General, either. "Hey!"

They all stopped and looked at him. Captain Jones responded. "Sir?"

"You guys ready to sign your ticket to Rio?"

Sam glanced at them, then nodded, "Let's go, people."

Jack walked them into the gateroom and nodded to the other two teams also waiting. He waved up at the control room, and the gate began dialling.

"You should say something, Jack." Daniel poked him in the arm. "Inspire the troops."

"Daniel."

"Jack."

"Daniel -"

"Just a few words, Jack."

"Fine, fine."

The gate whooshed into existance and Jack stepped up onto the ramp and turned to face his people. "Ah! I never get tired of this. The gate. Going through it to strange new worlds, seeking out new life and civilizations -"

"O'Neill, is that not -"

"Hush, T." Jack shoved his hands into his pockets. "What I'm sayin' is, good luck. Try not to get caught or killed. Come back to us, alive." The last was said as he looked directly at Sam.

She nodded, her eyes serious.

Everyone else saluted.

"Now, get the hell off my base, people."

A small snort escaped from the direction of Colonel Riker who displayed an innocent expression and a salute when Jack glanced over at her.

"SG-17 is ready to go, sir."

Jack nodded and stepped off the ramp, gesturing toward the gate. "You have a go, Colonel."

Teryl nodded and gestured at her team. "Let's go, people." They followed her up the ramp and disappeared, followed by Colonel Lambert and SG-15.

Sam smiled and saluted. "Don't let anyone mess with my lab, sir. Let's move out, SG-1."

"Don't worry, Carter, Siler _promised_ me they'd have it back to normal before you returned."

"I didn't hear that, sir," She called, glancing back with a smile. And then she stepped through the wormhole.

Jack stood and watched the last two skids trundle up the ramp, and then they were gone.

"General," Walter's voice came over the intercom. "The Alpha Site reports all arrived safe and sound, sir. And you have a meeting with SG-10 in five minutes."

"Thank you." He muttered as he turned away from the gate as the wormhole disappeared.

* * *

Sam looked at the full pack sitting on the bed in her quarters and sighed. What she wanted was to flop across the bed and allow herself a short wallow in self-pity at the fact that she'd be sleeping alone this evening. But she probably needed to unpack first. If only to clear some room. She pushed her hands in her pockets, a gesture she'd unconsciously picked up from her former CO, then frowned as she found something there.

There was a knock at the door.

"Come in."

Colonel Pierce entered. "Colonel Carter, I'm sorry for the interruption. I'm sure you'd like a bit more time to settle in, but Commander Thor has just arrived and wished to see a demonstration of the weapon you used on P3X-333."

She smiled. "Of course." She ran a hand through her hair. "If I could just have a moment, sir?"

Colonel Pierce nodded. "Briefing room in ten minutes, Colonel Carter."

"Thank you."

She reached into her pocket as the door closed and pulled out the mysterious object, breaking into a wide smile at finding one of Jack's battered yo-yo's. He must've slipped it to her while they were in the storage closet.

"Hope this isn't some sort of meta-commentary on my mental state," she murmured, running her fingertips gently over the toy before sliding it back into her pocket. She patted her hair, making sure it and she were somewhat tidy, before she slipped out of her quarters and headed for the briefing room.

Along the way, she ran into Mat'rik who was clearly delighted to see her again. He'd already run into Daniel and Teal'c who had gone out to talk to the rebel jaffa who were currently at the Alpha Site and he was settling in very well here, thank you.

"It will be wonderful to work alongside you again, Colonel Samantha," Mat'rik said, inclining his head respectfully.

She laughed. "Mat'rik, you know you can call me Sam, right?"

"But Colonel is your title, is it not?" Mat'rik asked, and Sam suddenly recognized the look of slight awe and deep admiration in his eyes.

So she smiled and nodded. "Yes, it is. But to my _friends_, I'm Sam."

Mat'rik paused, a slow smile crossing his face. "I am honored...Sam."

They continued on, Sam asking him how things were going. Once in the briefing room, Colonel Pierce introduced her to the scientists and Thor who greeted her with his usual solemnity, and turned the meeting over to her. "I'm not completely sure what Ba'al's weapon actually does, but it appears to be a variation of the energy emitted by a normal ribbon device combined with what could be gravity." She paused, then smiled, "Actually, it would probably be best to demonstrate it, if you'll all follow me."

With a nod to Colonel Pierce, she turned and left the room, heading for the lab area erected in one side of the hangar bay. There were technicians swarming the ship, as they approached, one of them came over. "Colonel Carter!"

"Hey, Dr. Frost." She smiled, "I thought I'd show everyone how this thing works."

"Sure thing, Colonel." With a smile of his own, Dr. Frost waved to one of his assistants, who scurried off and returned with the modified hand device.

Carefully, Sam slipped it on, feeling the metal warm as it wrapped around her skin. "Everyome ready?"

One of the scientists waved to a target. "We're ready, sir."

Opening her hand, Sam felt the power gathering down her arm a moment before it flashed outwards, the violet light enveloping the target. Control, she thought. And the target began to fall apart, pieces dropping to the ground.

Less than a minute later, it was gone. She shut down the device, panting slightly.

"You believe it would be possible to alter this device so that anyone could use it, Colonel Carter?" Thor asked, a note of what might be amazement in his voice.

She nodded. "That's what we hope, anyway."

"To have an effective weapon against the Replicators would restore a great deal of hope to the Asgard," Thor replied gravely.

Sam tried to fight down the surge of guilt she felt, remembering what had happened to the first highly effective weapon they'd managed to give the Asgard. There was nothing accusing in Thor's manner as he regarded her. She only sensed interest and barely-contained enthusiasm.

Sam looked down at the hand device, studying it as she pulled it from her arm and set it on a table. "During the battle on P3X-333, I observed that control of the hand device seems to be linked to the amount of emotional focus the user has."

"This some sort of Vulcan thing?" Dr. Frost asked. "Pushing down all your emotions?"

"Vulcan?" Thor asked, sounding politely baffled.

Sam grinned faintly and shook her head. "No. Not controlling your emotions, Dr. Frost. Focusing on certain ones." She looked thoughtful. "Focused will, maybe. You either have to be angry enough or want to destroy your target enough."

"Interesting." The man reached for the device, "And the weapon inside the cargo ship?"

"There wasn't time to test it," Sam looked over at the ship, "But, if you'd like...?"

It was probably irritating to the scientists to not be able to use either device without someone with naquadah in their blood.

Dr. Frost pursed his lips. "Actually, Colonel, I think we'd better wait until we've figured out how to shield more of the base from it. I'm not sure a massive surge of gravity would be good for some of the delicate electronics here."

"Right." She nodded. "Any questions?"

The scientists descended on her, asking question after question about her experience with the hand device and the cargo ship until she wanted to scream at them. Finally, Thor raised a hand. "I believe, Samantha Carter, you have provided us all with the data we require at this time."

"Well, good." She glanced at her watch, wincing, "I have a team meeting to get to. Have fun dissecting things."

Thor nodded and startled Sam by reaching out to shake her hand. "You have the gratitude of my people, Samantha Carter."

"Uh... you're welcome." She hoped she wasn't flushing. "It was the least I could do."

"Do not think of it," Thor answered graciously. "You have already given us a great deal."

"Thor... My mistake means that the one weapon we had against the Replicators was ineffective." Gesturing at the cargo ship, she sighed. "Who knows how long before they work out a way to protect themselves from this?"

"It will take them time. And, as all, we learn from our mistakes." Thor paused, then continued, "In the end, the responsibility of the Replicators can be laid solely at the door of the Asgard. Not at yours, Samantha."

"Well..." Awkwardly realizing he was right, but still unable to let the guilt go completely, Sam shifted, "I-I think we'll have to agree to disagree on this one."

Thor blinked. "As you wish."

"Yeah. Look, I should go. I'll see you later?"

"I assume so. Tell the rest of SG-1 I said good day."

Sam smiled, guessing he'd been picking up speech patterns from the people of Earth. "I'll do that."

Thor nodded, his expression as close to a smile as an Asgard could get. "I also hope that you will give my regards to O'Neill the next time you see him."

Sam's smile widened and she returned the nod. "I will. Thank you."


	12. All's Well That Ends Well

**The Continuing Misadventures of SG-1 or 101 Things A Girl Can Do.**  
by ALC Punk! and Ryuu  
_Chapter Twelve: All's Well That Ends Well_

"One more day," Teryl said with a relieved sigh, sitting down across from Sam in the mess.

Sam looked up from the notes she was jotting down about the hand device. "Huh?"

The other woman laughed. "One more day, Sam. We get to go back to Earth tomorrow for glorious shore leave, remember?"

"Oh yeah." Sam grinned. "It'll be nice. Daniel's already planning to spend the first day camping out at his favorite coffee shop." She put her notes aside. "Got anyone waiting for you back home?"

Teryl shook her head. "Just family. My little sister's expecting her first baby in three months. I planned to drop in." She took a sip of her coffee and shuddered faintly. "How about you?"

"Sort of..." Sam replied, flushing. "It's a little complicated right now."

"Aren't they always?" Teryl replied, laughing.

"Some more so than others," Sam muttered under her breath.

"Really?" Raising her eyebrows, Teryl lounged back in her chair. "Do tell."

Sam considered for a moment. She and the other team leader had grown to like and respect one another over the last three weeks. But she still didn't feel comfortable discussing her sex life. "Maybe later." She set her hand device down and leaned forwards, "But let me ask you something... Do you ever stop feeling lonely, when you sleep alone?"

Looking away, Teryl's smile slid away. "No. But if there's someone to go home to..."

"Yeah." Sam toyed with the stylus. "That's what I thought."

"But, be glad, you're going to see him tomorrow."

"Oh, I definitely am." A smirk flitted across her lips.

Teryl smiled and held up her mug. "To family, ifriends/i..." her eyes twinkled, "and glorious, glorious shore leave."

Sam returned the toast. "Hear, hear."

"So, had any fun on your off-world missions?"

"Not really, no." Unlike the one before their reassignment, the two missions SG-1 had been scheduled for had been quiet and routine. It had been a nice break. Even if strangely odd to come home not to the SGC but to the Alpha Site. "You?"

"We had one bad moment on our second mission." She shook her head. "Some natives took exception to me being in charge."

"Ah." Making a face, Sam nodded. "Been there."

"Luckily, my team is good. We made it back without too much trouble. And I even brought the naquadah with us."

"Good job, Colonel."

"Why thanks, Colonel."

The two women shared a smile.

"Am I interrupting?"

Sam turned to smile at Daniel. "Not at all. Have a seat."

"Dr. Jackson." Teryl saluted him with her mug.

"Colonel Riker," Daniel replied pleasantly.

She chuckled. "If Sam's allowed to call me Teryl, you certainly are."

He slid into the seat next to Sam. "Then I'm Daniel." He looked askance at his own coffee and pushed the mug aside. "So, tomorrow!"

"Yep." Teryl raised an eyebrow. "So... join in the girl talk, Daniel. You got anyone at home?"

He flushed. "Well, I was thinking of, erm, seeing if Sarah wanted to go out to dinner or something."

Sam chuckled. "How sweet!"

Daniel made a face. "And what about _you_, Colonel Carter?"

"Well, I was going to see if Cassie wanted to do something-she said she'd have the weekend off."

"And that's all?"

"Yes."

"Uh-huh." Smirking, Daniel waved a hand, "So, you won't be going on a date with a not-retired man who we won't name."

"Daniel."

"Sam."

Teryl chuckled, "You two remind me of my niece and nephew." She tilted her head to one side. "So, who besides me is going to buy a bunch of things we can't eat here?"

"Coffee." Daniel shuddered, "Lots and lots of it."

"I'll take that as a yes." Teryl shook her head, "I should have known better than to ask the renowned Dr. I Mainline Coffee Jackson if he was -"

She was interrupted by the sirens going off and the announcement over the intercom, "Unscheduled off world activation!"

Daniel and Sam were up and out of their chairs, heading for the door before Teryl realized it. She followed on their heels, surprised to find herself interested. She hadn't been one to crowd into the control room, before. But SG-1 seemed to do it naturally.

The three hovered near the back of the control room as Colonel Pierce directed operations. "Who is it?"

The Lieutenant looked up, "It's SG-15, sir. Coming in hot."

"Right. Let them through."

The recently-minted iris slid open smoothly. It had been one of the modifications the General had suggested for the Alpha Site along with the teams. SG-15 came running through, weapons fire following them. One stray shot smashed into the wall nearby, and Teryl winced. Someone wasn't going to be happy about that.

Then the iris slid closed, and a moment later the wormhole disengaged.

Colonel Lambert gasped for breath and gave his team a quick glance, clearly ticking everyone off a mental checklist, then managed to straighten up and salute Colonel Pierce.

"Sir. We ran into a bit of an ambush on the way back, but SG-15 is all accounted for."

"Goa'uld?" Pierce asked.

"Yes, sir," Lambert nodded. "Permission to get my team checked out for injuries?"

"Of course. Dismissed, SG-15."

The weary team tossed off a series of salutes as they filed off in the direction of the infirmary. Teryl shook her head, clearly reminiscing about a few too many similar entrances for herself and SG-17.

"You think it's bad to be the team coming in, but it's not much easier to just watch, is it?" Sam remarked softly.

"No." Teryl glanced up at her. "But it's worse when you know it's iyour/i team in danger, really."

Daniel sighed. "It's never easy to see your own in danger."

"No." Sam looked away, "I suppose it isn't."

"Sam."

"It's all right, Daniel." She tried to smile.

Teryl looked between the two of them, "I'm sure I'm missing something here."

"It's nothing," Daniel explained, then continued, "So, how's the packing going for your trip home?"

"Real smooth, Daniel."

"I try."

Teryl chuckled, "It's going well, Daniel."

"Good, good." He shoved his hands into his pockets, "I think I'm going to go find Jonas."

"0745 tomorrow, Daniel!" Sam said with a smile.

"Can't wait," he replied with obvious delight. He gave her and Teryl an ironic salute and walked off.

Teryl glanced at her watch, then looked speculatively at Sam.

"What?"

"I have some free time and some energy to burn. You want to spar for a bit?"

Sam grinned. "You think you can take me?" she challenged, half-jokingly.

"Maybe." Grinning herself, Teryl gestured, "Want to find out, Colonel?"

"I could use the workout."

They continued on to the gym, exchanging friendly barbs about their prowess until they were standing on the mats, bodies limbered by a quick stretching session. Slowly, they circled, each watching the other for a moment. Then Sam lashed out, feinting carefully. Teryl blocked, then returned a jab.

Another exchange of blows and then they began in earnest. Every punch was countered, every kick blocked until Sam pulled a move Teal'c had taught her, sliding inside the other woman's defence and smashing her palm underneath her jaw.

She danced back as Teryl went down and rolled back to her feet quickly.

"Not bad."

"Thanks."

Sam didn't wait for her to attack again, she dove back in. This time there were missed blocks on both sides. Sam took a fist to the jaw, spun around and clocked Teryl with her elbow. As she hit the mat, Teryl foot-swept her, and they wrestled on the ground for a moment before Sam had the other woman pinned down.

"Give."

Releasing her, Sam rolled off and got to her feet again. She held out a hand to Teryl, the Colonel took it, and she hoisted her up onto her feet.

"You're holding back, Riker."

"In your dreams, Carter."

Sam crooked her fingers at the other woman. "Let's do it."

The free-for-all changed, becoming more violent as the two women sparred as if in actual battle. Ferocity fueled their blows and blocks, kicks that could knock off heads (at the right angle) slammed into flesh, the sound echoing in the gym. By the time a minute was up, they were both panting. Two minutes, and Teryl succeeded in knocking Sam to the ground, followed her down, and pinned her.

"Give."

They broke apart and got back to their feet. Sam moved first, shoulder smashing into the other woman, and they tumbled to the mats again. It took less than ten seconds for her to pin Colonel Riker, and she held on, ignoring the sweat crawling down her face.

"Give."

Sam flopped backwards onto the mat, panting.

Teryl managed to push herself into a half-sitting position and shot Sam a tired grin. "You _are_ good. Teal'c teach you all that?"

"Teal'c, J-General O'Neill, Bra'tac..." Sam caught her breath and sat up, "several super-soldiers, a few jaffa ambushes..."

Teryl snorted. "No one could ever say we live boring lives, huh?"

"Not by a long shot." Sam rolled her eyes.

The other Colonel chuckled. "Think Teal'c would be willing to teach me a few moves? They could come in handy next time we manage to piss off a System Lord."

"Sure. Knowing him, he'll decide to take the opportunity and punch some new moves into my body." Sam winced, "I'll talk to him, see if we can set up a training schedule for when we come back here."

"Thanks." This time, Teryl stood first, and held out a hand. "I may even get the rest of my team interested in the idea."

Sam let out a tired chuckle, "Teal'c's Jaffa Self Defense Courses. He could make a mint."

"Hey, he could bankroll the SGC for a year."

They both chuckled as they left to hit the showers.

* * *

"...and aside from a few minor injuries, mostly from SG-15's adventure yesterday, I would say that the first three weeks of this project have been a success, sir," Colonel Carter said, looking briefly at Colonels Lambert and Riker who nodded agreement.

"SG-15 is more than ready to go back into the field as soon as Major Golden's wrist heals, sir," Lambert added. He smiled. "No clue how she handled dialing the DHD with a fractured wrist, but it saved our hides on that mission."

Colonel Riker grinned. "SG-17 was more than happy to get some shore leave, sir, but a week's R&R will have them ready to go again."

"And you're all settling in at the Alpha Site?" Jack asked.

The three colonels nodded.

"There are a few kinks to work out," Teryl said, "but I think we'll be able to accommodate another three teams there easily."

"Good, good." The General made a notation on his legal pad, then looked at them, "Anything else to add?"

A chorus of no's.

"Dismissed, then. Walter?"

The aide-de-cranky-General bustled up. "Your call to the Pentagon can go through at any time, sir, and those recquisitions for the mess hall only need a signature, Sergeant Lewis looked them over himself."

"Less paperwork." He sighed.

"Sir?"

Jack blinked. One of his Colonels had stayed. "Carter."

A slight smile tugged at her lips. "Have you eaten lunch?"

"Carter, I'm not even sure I had breakfast."

"Uh, you did, sir." Walter glanced between them, "But it was a long time ago."

"SG-1 will be meeting for lunch in about half an hour, if you'd like to join us." She smiled at Walter, "You're welcome, too, Sergeant."

"Thank you, sir."

"Walter, can you go get me those forms? I'll finish them up before lunch."

"Yes, sir!" Walter saluted cheerfully and bustled off.

Sam smiled over at Jack. "So, I'll be seeing you in half an hour?" She took a quick glance at the closed door, then leaned in to kiss him.

He sighed and reached up to take hold of her hand. "God, I've missed you, Carter."

She smirked. "My place or yours?"

Jack smirked back, standing and putting his arms around her. "Well, your place _is_ closer, but I think I have the bigger bed." He leaned in and returned the kiss.

"Decisions, decisions," she said, grinning. She kissed him again and pulled back, fishing in her pocket and pulling out his yo-yo. "I kept meaning to thank you for this."

He took it, "Really?"

"Yeah." She glanced towards the door, leaned in and kissed him very quickly, then stepped back. "Kept me from being bored while on watch."

Jack snorted, "And your fabulous brain didn't?"

"There's only so many things I can think of." A smirk crossed her lips, and she opened the door. "I'll see you at lunch, sir."

"Carter."

She glanced back in. "Sir?"

"I'm glad you're back."

"Me, too."

* * *

A shaft of sunlight made its way through the window, managing to somehow beam right into Jack's eyes. He groaned softly and put his hand over his eyes, then began the mental self-assessment that most people do on first waking up.

Arms? Check. Two of those.

Legs? Yep. Also got a pair, complete with bum knees.

The usual aches and twinges brought on by a life that was generally too exciting? Jack groaned again. Oh yeah. Big check on that one.

A warm and naked Samantha Carter sleeping snuggled against his back? Jack blinked. Okay, that was a new one.

He suddenly woke up more and turned, cuddling her against him. She protested sleepily at the abrupt movement.

"Jack..."

"You're here," he said, staring for a moment before bending to kiss her forehead.

"Course I'm here," she grumbled drowsily. "You told me to stay."

"I did?" He did?

"Yes." Her hand smacked at his arm. "Go back to sleep."

"Er, Carter..."

"Jack." Her tone was suddenly very clear. And very irritated. "It's not even eight. If you get out of this bed, I'm going home and you won't see me until the next time we're back from the Alpha Site."

Damn. Decisions, decisions. He kissed her cheek. "I have to pee."

"But you'll be back?"

She still hadn't opened her eyes. "Definitely."

"That's allowed then."

Jack was washing his hands before it occured to him that Samantha Carter was sleeping in his bed. Okay, so it had been made evident. But this, this meant... things like stability. Committment. I'll be there for you, as that song Cassie liked to sing said. He shivered, wondering if it was suddenly cold, or if that was terror creeping along his nerves.

"Hey." She was now standing in the doorway of his bathroom, staring at him.

"Hey."

Sam stepped in and stretched up to kiss him, turning him so he was suddenly outside the door. "Now I need it." The door closed, then opened again a moment later, and Jack accepted the toothbrush and paste she handed him. "Use these."

Jack looked at them, then at the closed door. He kicked at it. "Carter?"

"What?" she called through the door.

"This whole sleeping over thing... it's going to be a regular occurrence, right?"

Water ran, and he thought he heard the toilet flush.

"Carter?"

The door was yanked open, and she eyed him, her toothbrush in one hand. "What?"

"You'll be here tomorrow."

She blinked. "Was planning on it, yeah."

"And the next day?"

She was starting to give him that 'I love you but I'm worried that you've lost your mind' look. "Yes?"

Jack caught his breath. "And the day after that?"

"And every day until I go back the Alpha Site, Jack," she answered, smiling.

He couldn't stop the enormous grin that broke out over his face. "Cool."

"Jack?"

"Hrm?"

"Brush your teeth."

"That can wait," he informed her, hands settling on her waist.

"It can?"

"Yup." And then he kissed her.

Hrm. Maybe he should brush his teeth.

"Carter?"

"Jack?"

His hands slid along her sides, exploring gently. "After I brush my teeth..."

"Yeah?"

"Can we go back to bed and not get out of it again for the rest of the week?"

She chuckled, kissing his cheek. "You can pretty much count on it."

f-

Well. If you got this far, congratulations!

We hoped you enjoyed the show.  
Final Notes Lys: This was begun one night with a throw-away joke I made about Daniel teasing Sam about the Prometheus experience in Grace. Surprisingly, it snow-balled. About midway through what is now chapter two, I realized we had something, didn't know what, thought. Imagine my surprise when towards the end I took a wordcount and we were over 30,000... Quite a few of the things in here are stuff we've bitched about to each other regarding the current season and characterization. And, well, we think Sam is damn cool.  
Ryuu: This is what you get when two scary Sam-fangirls write fic together. We hope we've done her proud and we hope we've done our duty by the rest of SG-1 as well.


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